Operation Snog
by erinnn
Summary: After Lily breaks up with her longtime boyfriend, she finds herself in a dating slump. To help her get out of it, her friend makes an interesting bet: Lily has to snog a boy in a month, or else...
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: And so begins another story. My hopes for it are: for it to be finished, for it to be good and well received and for it to be plausible. Let's cross our fingers and hope for the best. ) And to everyone the reads this, please review. Wouldn't you like to make me happy? Reviews make me happy. Everyone who reviews gets a cookie. Yay!**

**DISCLAIMER: I didn't create Harry Potter because I'm not JK Rowling, I don't have any legal rights to any of the merchandise, yadda yadda yadda. Everyone knows that drill, right? Good.**

Everyone who did not know Lily Evans very well thought that she was perfect. She excelled in school, was made Head Girl, had a very cute cat and a very handsome owl, had long auburn hair and shockingly clear green eyes and had a sense of humour.

But she did not have a boyfriend because Thomas, a seventh-year Ravenclaw and her boyfriend for the past eight months, had just broken up with her. The news of their breakup spread like wild fire throughout the halls of Hogwarts because during their time together, they had reigned as a Hogwarts power couple, with her being Head Girl and his being the Ravenclaw Quidditch captain.

The day after the "Big Breakup" Lily couldn't walk down the school's corridors without people—mostly girls—running up to her to express their sympathies.

"Oh, gosh, Lily. You must be so sad!"

"He was _such_ a good catch. What did you do to drive him away?"

"I'm actually so sorry. He wasn't good enough for you."

"What are you talking about? He was _hot!_"

"Shhh! I'm trying to comfort her, dork!"

Lily didn't really listen to any of the comments. She walked around in a daze, aware that her eyes were swollen from crying the night before. She was still emotionally raw and remained that way for the next week. During the days after that she was in denial. After that she became ferociously angry. Then came the sullenness and the depression.

Unfortunately for everyone but James Potter, that final stage lasted the longest.

**---**

"Lily? _Lily!_"

The redhead blinked and stared at the brown-haired owner of the voice. It was McKenna Simmons, her closest friend. The two girls had a few similarities, but in many ways they were polar opposites. Both were opinionated weren't afraid to stand up for themselves, but McKenna was more so. She was extremely outgoing and open about anything and everything. She had a shorter fuse than Lily but was also quicker to laugh. She could be extremely friendly, was easier to love and yet she was easier to hate.

"Lily, can you even hear me?" said McKenna. She was beginning to sound agitated.

Lily blinked again and nodded her head ever so slightly. She could hear the usual sounds of the Gryffindor common room again.

"Are you okay?"

Lily nodded again. She was okay if you ignored the fact that she was thinking about Thomas… _still_.

"You're thinking about him again, aren't you?"

Lily shook her head. She didn't want to admit that she still though about the BB a lot. If people found out they'd think that she wasn't worthy to be Head Girl. And she couldn't have that happening.

"Don't lie to me," McKenna pressed. "I know you are. You've got that look in your eyes."

"What look?" said Lily defensively. "I haven't got a _look._"

"If you don't have a look, than I've never had sex."

Lily stared at her friend with a slightly disgusted expression. "That's something I really didn't need to hear."

"Don't be prude."

"I'm not!"

McKenna rolled her eyes and said, "That's not the point. The point is that I know you were thinking about Thomas and/or your breakup. And Lily," she said hurriedly knowing that her friend would try and interrupt, "he's not worth mourning over like that. He's nice, he's charming and all that but he wasn't perfect. He wasn't perfect for _you_."

Lily wasn't listening. She had heard that speech many times before and was sure she'd hear it many times again.

McKenna sighed. "You've got to get over him."

"Was it my fault?" Lily murmured, staring out the window. "Did I do something wrong?"

The brown-haired girl made a strangled noise resembling a pig being slaughtered and looked ready to slap some sense into her friend.

"Could I have done something else? Was I annoying? Did I annoy him?'

"NO," McKenna exploded, "BUT YOU SURE AS HELL ARE ANNOYING ME NOW."

"What?"

"This isn't like you!" she exclaimed. "You've never been so dependant on boys before. You've never let someone just ruin your life by breaking up with you. I never thought you would be one of those girls..."

"What girls?"

"One of _those!_ You know, like Marissa…" she waved her hand in the sixth-year's general direction, "… and Heather…" this time she pointed, "and you know, girls like that! Girls who think that they're incomplete if they don't have a boyfriend. Pathological flirts. Your typical hormonal teenager."

"Actually, McKenna, I've always thought you were more of the stereotypical teen," Lily informed her.

"Lately you've become really anti-social and annoying," she said, carrying on as if she hadn't heard Lily. "And I'm only saying that because I care."

"Thanks," said Lily with biting sarcasm. She opened her mouth to say more but was interrupted by someone poking her side. "What?" she snapped, turning around.

James Potter was standing there, smiling cheekily. "We have a meeting to go to, remember?"

McKenna snorted. "Sorry, Potter. It's almost been two months since school started and I still think it's weird to think that _you_ made Head Boy."

"Sorry, Simmons, but I still think it's weird that your mother didn't hex you into another world when she first saw your face," James shot back.

"Ouch," Lily said, looking at her friend, a shadow of a smile on her face.

"Nice," said McKenna. She nodded her head approvingly. "Your comebacks are getting better."

"They were always good," he retorted.

McKenna snorted. "You wish," she laughed. "So are you getting ready for the match?"

She did not need to refer to which match. Everyone in the Gryffindor Tower was obsessing over the upcoming Ravenclaw-Gryffindor Quidditch match. Lily was also unnaturally interested. Usually, she was a mere interested spectator, but this time it almost felt like if Gryffindor beat Ravenclaw to a bloody pulp, it would make her failed relationship easier to bear.

"'Course. The team's been practicing four nights a week. And we've been making up new plays and stuff. They're not going to know what hit them," he announced proudly. He was the captain of the Gryffindor team, and it was no secret that the sport was one of his great loves.

Lily almost admired his intensity. At least he was serious about _something. _But then he glanced at Lily, said, "You ready yet?" and the moment was gone.

"Of course," she said shortly, smoothing out the invisible wrinkles on her skirt. "I'll see you later, okay, McKenna?" With that, she made her way to the portrait hole with James a few steps behind her.

The two walked in silence for a moment before James tried to make small talk.

"So, er, how's school?" he asked awkwardly.

"It's good."

There was an awkward pause.

"School's good for me too. Thanks for asking, Evans," he half-jokingly said.

Lily sighed, but didn't say anything.

"Wow. I'm really awed by your manners. You're so polite," he teased.

"Stuff it, Potter," she said.

"Why?"

"Why are you even asking?" she snapped, giving him an extremely evil look.

"I'm interested, that's all."

"Fine! Do you really and truly want to know?" She waited until James nodded before exploding. "Because you've been a thorn in my side for the past six years. Because you used to relentlessly and shamelessly chase after me and in doing so, embarrassed the life out of me. Because I'm not in the best of moods right now and because I bloody said so. So just shut up!"

"Oh." James looked at her, a slightly amused expression gracing his features. "You have an awful lot of pent-up anger."

Lily felt like screaming and pulling her hair out. "I do _not!_"

"Then I must really know how to push your buttons."

"I haven't any buttons to push!"

"Then why are you yelling at me?"

Why? _Why?_ There were so many reasons that Lily had a hard time choosing just one. There was the fact that she was still hung up on her ex-boyfriend, there was the fact that her sister pissed the hell out of her and then there was the fact that her best friend just called her annoying and needy. But she most certainly didn't want to tell _James_ any of that.

"That's none of your business," she said curtly.

"As I'm the recipient of your rather foul mood, I think I'm inclined to at least know the reason you're so… _difficult_, for lack of a better word," James said breezily.

Lily stopped walking and shook her head in disbelief. "I really can't believe that anyone can think as highly of themselves as you do. You think you're _inclined_ to know the reason behind everything. Well, as the one in the horrid mood, I think I'm _inclined_ to a little privacy. Is that alright with you?"

James didn't answer her so she turned and began to walk, her shoes hitting the floor harder than usual. After a while she calmed down but didn't look behind her, which was fine because James didn't say anything else either. They traveled to Dumbledore's office in a rather uncomfortable, tense silence. Lily reached the stone gargoyle that guarded the Headmaster's quarters and was saying the password when James suddenly broke the silence between them.

"Hey Evans?"

Lily didn't say anything but acknowledged his presence by glancing behind her.

"Er," he started. There was a pause as he stood there taking in a deep breath, "I'm sorry." He pushed in front of her and moved quickly up the winding staircase.

Lily was dumbfounded. "He's sorry?" she said aloud to no one in particular.

Who was he, and what did he do with the real James Potter?


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Chapter two! Chapter two! This is so exciting. I'm starting chapter two! I'm actually overcoming a bout of writer's block, so I apologize in advance for the inevitable crappiness of the chapter. And don't forget to leave constructive criticism in your reviews!**

**DISCLAIMER: I didn't create Harry Potter because I'm not JK Rowling, I don't have any legal rights to any of the merchandise, yadda yadda yadda. Everyone knows that drill, right? Good. **

James and Lily walked back to the Gryffindor common room, with Lily slightly ahead of James. She was well aware of the fact that her forehead was wrinkly, her mouth was in a little unhappy frown and her green eyes were darker than usual. It wasn't _her_ fault, mind you. It was definitely James'. The smirk on his face told it all. He _knew_ she was angry. And in a weird, sadistic way, he liked it.

"Evans," he called, "why are you walking so fast?"

The auburn-haired girl didn't even look at him. She continued to march forward, her eyes clouding more and more.

"I said I was sorry, didn't I?" he asked with just the tiniest note of desperation in his voice. So tiny, in fact, that it was only noticeable to those with an extremely keen ear, which—to James' great misfortune—Lily had.

Ha. So she was getting to him. It served him right. He was a pompous, insensitive, practical joking git. She _wanted_ to wipe the annoyingly smug look off of his face. She _wanted _to punch him in the mouth.

Lily didn't answer him, but she was so used to giving James the silent treatment that it didn't take much effort to ignore his child-like whines.

"I'm _sor_-ry!"

The two Heads reached the Gryffindor portrait-hole. For a moment, Lily contemplated being civil to the creature, the epitome of all that was evil in the world, but then common sense kicked in and she quickly muttered the password and just as quickly shut the door behind her. She heard James give an indignant cry, but she ignored that and stomped to the stairs, and then ascended to her awaiting dormitory.

Then she slammed the door.

A groan came from the bed closest to the window. "Lily?" a groggy voice called out.

"McKenna? You're still up?" she replied in surprise.

"Well, I am now."

"Oh. Okay."

McKenna untangled herself from her bed sheets and sat up. "What's wrong?" she yawned while stretching her lanky body. "Wait. Let me guess. Potter did something."

Lily located her pajamas in the dark — what _were_ they doing under her bed? — and changed into the soft flannel. "How could you guess?"

"It's always Potter," her friend said, shrugging.

Lily pulled off her socks and slid her aching feet into her fuzzy blue slippers. She walked into the adjoining bathroom and began to brush her teeth. "Ish alhway Pottuh," she said her mouth full of toothpaste. She meant to agree with her friend and echo her words, "It's always Potter," in agreement, but her mouth was full of toothpaste. It would have been quite disgusting if she had spit out all the foam.

"So what did he do this time? Something I would find stupid, or something you would find stupid?" asked McKenna. She came and leaned on the bathroom doorframe.

Spitting out the foam, Lily answered, "Something everyone _should_ find to be stupid, but I honestly think I'm the only one with enough sense to _know_ that it's stupid." She grabbed the cup that was on the counter and began to gurgle.

"Oh, really?"

"Gurgle gur."

McKenna rolled her eyes. "Right. Like I can understand exactly what you're saying when you talk like that."

The water went flying from Lily's mouth into the sink. "Sorry. I said: 'Well, _duh_.' He's just the most infuriating specimen of the male species that I've ever met in my entire life! Do you know what he did tonight? _Do you know what he did?_"

"No. But I'm assuming that you'll tell me."

Lily grabbed a bar of soap and washed the minimal make-up off of her face. "That prick! He's _such_ a prick! So we were on our way to Dumbledore's office on the account of him being Head Boy and all, and he _apologizes_ to me. I had no idea what for. So I thought, 'Hey, maybe Potter grew up,'" she explained while she wasn't splashing water on her face.

"But you were wrong?"

Lily grabbed a towel and patted her face dry. "Extremely wrong. The meeting went okay, but as it was nearing its end and Dumbledore was filling out some papers for us, Potter looked at me and said, 'Evans, I ran into your ex, Thomas today. He's looking pretty well, don't you think?'"

"Oh, no."

"Oh, _yes!_ Just like that. As if it was nothing. As if my heart isn't already completely broken because yes, Thomas is looking quite well. And I'm here withering away like a dying birch tree in October!"

Furiously, Lily grabbed her bottle of facial lotion and applied copious amounts of it to her face.

McKenna walked back to her bed and slipped underneath the covers. "You might want to keep your voice down. I doubt you want the others to hear about this?"

After switching the light off, Lily angrily made her way to her bed and snuggled into the comforting comforters. That's what they were there for, after all.

"Lily?"

"You want me to be quiet when Potter just poured salt onto my open wound?"

A deep and loud sigh was heard. "I don't think that Potter knew he was pouring salt onto your wound. I don't think he even thought that you're dying like some stupid flower in October. He was probably just making conversation."

"I didn't say I was dying like a flower. I said a birch tree. Clearly, a tree is not a flower."

"_Whatever_," came the exasperated reply. "I just… I don't think he meant it, okay?"

"Of course he meant it. He's Potter! The bane of my existence! The thorn in my side! The pebble in my boot!"

"You don't wear boots," McKenna reminded her.

"I'll start tomorrow," Lily shot back. "And then I promise you that he'll be the pebble in it. In any case, he's a completely awful, foul flobberworm."

"Why d'you think that? I mean, I know he's crass and a little mean sometimes, but all in all, he's a nice guy. If you saw him — really and truly saw him — you'd see that."

Lily shifted in her bed. She didn't like it when McKenna popped profound remarks like that. It seemed unnatural. Her words resonated in her head until she fell asleep.

"…_he's a nice guy. If you saw him — really and truly saw him — you'd see that… he's a nice guy. If you saw him — really and truly saw him — you'd see that…"_

_---  
_

Lily awoke the next morning with an unsettled feeling in the pit of her stomach. She was still upset with James and pondering McKenna's words. Silently, she pulled her covers off of her and slid into her slippers and housecoat. She walked over to the pitcher off of water and noticed that it was unusually cold to touch. Curious, she looked outside and saw that the earth was covered in a layer of what seemed to be sparkling, pristine snow.

"Oh, my gosh!" she cried, excitement bubbling up from deep inside of her.

Lily loved snow. Almost as much as she loved minty, chocolately substances. It reminded her of her early childhood days; before she found out she was a witch, before her sister started hating her. The Evanses would all go out to a Sunday brunch, which was almost always followed by snowball fights, the creation of huge snow forts and fat snowmen and women.

"Eurgh?" her roommates asked in unison.

"It _snowed!_"

"Eurgh."

"Look! It snowed!"

"Lily," Emmeline Vance grumbled, "_shut up_."

"But it _snowed_ in the middle of _October_. This is a momentous occasion! We need Butterbeer and minty, chocolately things! We need to celebrate!"

"Stuff it," Heather mumbled, her voice thick with sleep.

Lily ignored her roommates and decided that it was going to be a wonderful day. She would put all the nastiness of yesterday behind her. She would start fresh. She would no longer be a dying birch, but a pine tree, sweet and green throughout the winter.

Cheerfully, she picked her uniform off of the cold stone floor and changed. Just as cheerfully, she got ready for the new, pine-ish day that was awaiting her.

The day started off with Care of Magical Creatures. It was not one of Lily's favourite classes, but it was exciting. That day they were dealing with fire salamanders. It was a class worthy of fourth-year students. But because of the unexpected snowfall, Professor Kettleburn had little else to teach.

"It's nippy out here," Sirius Black complained to his best friends, Remus Lupin, Peter Pettigrew and Potter.

Lily wanted to roll her eyes. She turned to face McKenna and say something both mean and witty about the four boys who called themselves the Marauders, but McKenna was not there.

"That's odd," she said to herself. "I know for a fact that she came out to class with me."

"Aw, is ickle Lilykins talking to herself again?" James teased, seeing her muttering to air.

Lily whipped her head around and narrowed her eyes at him. "No, but ickle Lilykins wants you to sod off," she said, her voice full of poison. James was obviously still a bit miffed about her behavior last night. His eyes narrowed as well, but he did not say anything more.

Smiling with a touch of smugness and self-satisfaction, Lily turned back to Emmeline, Dorcas Meadowes and Heather.

The remainder of the class was spent worrying about McKenna. While she was no stranger to skipping, McKenna usually skipped the last class of the day. Why would anyone want to skip the first one when they were already awake?

At lunch, Lily wandered into the Great Hall with Emmeline and Dorcas—Heather was off with her Ravenclaw boyfriend, Vince, who was Thomas' close friend. For shame. Immedeately, Lily looked around and spotted McKenna. She hurriedly sat beside her friend. She was going to ask where her friend had been, but Lily noted that McKenna had a starry look in her eye. A look that Lily knew all too well…

"Who were you snogging?"

Unashamed, McKenna pointed to a seventh-year Hufflepuff.

"McKenna," Lily began in a disapproving tone of voice.

"But it's not just snogging," the brown-haired girl interrupted. "It's so much more. Lily, he asked me to be his girlfriend!"

Lily felt her jaw drop. "How long have you known him?"

"Since first year, of course."

"No, I mean how long have you actually known him, not just know of him."

"Since nine o'clock this morning."

"McKenna!"

The happy, dazed look left McKenna's face. "Look, Lily," she said, "ever since Thomas broke up with you, you've been afraid of relationships. Just because _you're_ commitment-phobic, doesn't mean that I am. Just because _you_ don't want to be in a relationship doesn't mean that I can't be. Just because _you're _afraid of boys doesn't mean that I can't touch them or kiss them or snog them or shag them."

Lily was stunned. She couldn't think of anything to say but "I am _not_ afraid of boys."

Her friend began to shovel food into her mouth. "Right, right. You just haven't _looked_ at a boy since the BB. That doesn't say anything at all."

"I am _not_ afraid of them!"

McKenna's eyes flashed. "Oh yeah?"

"Yes."

"Then prove it."

"Okay," said Lily stubbornly. "Wait… what? How?"

McKenna chewed on her salad for a moment. She looked like she was lost in thought. As she swallowed her mouthful, it was like a light bulb went off over her head. "Let's make a bet."

Lily looked at her wearily. "Of what sort?"

"I bet that you can't snog at least one boy in a month's time."

Lily's emerald eyes went wide. And circular. They resembled green saucers. "What? What'll that prove?"

"Trust me. It all makes sense." McKenna stuck out her hand. "Deal?" she challenged, arching one eyebrow.

Hesitantly, Lily lifted her own hand. Without thinking, she shook McKenna's hand. "Deal," she stated. Then she began to laugh. She laughed knowing that she was trapped in this crazy, nonsensical bet with her best friend. But what harm could come of it? So what if she didn't kiss a boy within the month? It wasn't as if McKenna could do anything except ridicule her. And Lily could take ridicule.

McKenna stuffed another forkful of salad into her mouth. "But if you lose, Lils, you have to snog the person I chose for you."

Uh-oh.

Lily's pine-y day had just turned very birch-y.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I think I actually kinda sorta like this story! It's the only one that I'm not really embarrassed to show. And in the future, I hope I don't feel the urge to delete this from FFN. Let's hope!**

**Oh, and don't forget to review p**

**DISCLAIMER: I didn't create Harry Potter because I'm not JK Rowling, I don't have any legal rights to any of the merchandise, yadda yadda yadda. Everyone knows that drill, right? Good. **

Lily sat in her Ancient Runes class — her last class of the day — nervously biting the tip of her Sugar Quill. She didn't use it often, just when she was nervous. To those who are candy-obsessed, sugar makes the world seem better. It makes life seem like bunnies with fluffy cotton tails and daisies popping out of the ground…

Except it really wasn't making Lily any calmer. She was still a bundle of nerves.

_Thwap_. Something lightly hit her in the back of the head. But since she was so tense, she jumped out of her chair and screeched.

"Miss Evans?" the professor asked, confused. "Does something about the Etruscan language scare you?"

Lily flushed. Really, really deeply.

"No, no, professor. Sorry about that. It won't happen again," she stammered, quickly resuming her seat.

"Alright," the professor said, blinking away the confusion. He then picked up his pointing stick — which he had dropped when Lily screamed bloody murder — and resumed his lesson.

Ignoring the sniggers from the back of the classroom, Lily looked down and saw what had hit her: A rolled up piece of parchment. She picked it up curiously and opened it up.

_Lily, _

_PREPARE TO LOSE!_

_Love,_

_McKenna_

Lily had humiliated herself because of _that_? That stupid, insignificant, condescending note that was a complete and utter _lie_? Her teacher thought she was insane for THAT? Inconceivable. She whirled her head around and glared at her best friend, who was sitting there, smiling innocently with a laughing Dorcas a few seats behind her.

"I won't lose," she mouthed. McKenna rolled her eyes, so Lily threw her a dirty look before turning around to face the front of the classroom, a glint of determination in her eye.

Lily wouldn't lose the bet. She _couldn't_ lose the bet. Who knew what foul creature McKenna would pick out for her to snog? Knowing her, it would probably be some extremely hairy piece of crust with spit flecks at the corners of his mouth. Or it could be a Slytherin. Or worse: A spit-flecky Slytherin!

Lily shuddered at the thought.

And she kept on shuddering until class let out.

Spit flecks… ugh.

As people began to leave the room, the professor called out, "Don't forget to read up on the Etruscans and their writing system!" in a frantic attempt to make sure everyone heard the homework.

McKenna walked to Lily's desk and gave a snort of disgust.

"Why're you writing the homework down?"

Without looking up from her day planner, Lily said, "Because this way, I actually get homework done. You know, if _you_ wrote down your homework once in a while…"

"Oh, sod off."

Lily smiled at her friend's lack of initiative and packed her books into her bag.

"So…" McKenna began as they left the room. She clasped her hands together eagerly and looked at Lily expectantly.

The redhead just quirked an eyebrow, not having the faintest clue at what her friend was getting at.

"So…" McKenna repeated, still looking at her friend.

There was silence.

McKenna sighed and said, "Have you chosen your victim yet?"

"Victim?" asked Lily blankly. Then a light bulb went off over her head. "Ohh!"

_Of course_ she had a victim. Her victim had been her victim for an astoundingly long time. She wanted to go up to him and start snogging his brains out, but she couldn't. Not only was she too shy for that, but there was an unspoken law that you couldn't do that to anyone, much less your ex-boyfriend.

"No, I don't," she lied, flushing.

McKenna gave her a disgusted look before stating, "You're lying."

"_What?_"

"It's so very obvious that you want Thomas. Because you _love_ him," she sang out loudly. "You _want_ him. You want to _kiss_ him, you want to _shag_ him, you want his _babies_…"

Lily blushed so deeply at that, she resembled a very ketchup-y ketchup chip. But she wasn't just embarrassed. She was a little angry. McKenna _knew_ that she still really liked Thomas. She knew how… how… emotionally _raw_ Lily was. And then to rub that in her face? That was inexcusable. It was almost as bad as forcing Lily to kiss a spit-fleck infested boy.

Almost. But spit flecks… ugh.

"For your information, I was not thinking of that, er, that conceited, arrogant… _thing_!"

"Ok-ay…"

"Really McKenna," said Lily as she increased her speed. "You need to believe me more. After all, isn't that what best friends do?"

She couldn't see McKenna's face, but she could _feel_ her friend roll her eyes.

"Alright, alright, whatever. I believe you. But, you've got to pick up the pace, Lily! Time's running out."

Lily stopped walking and faced her friend, with an incredulous look on her delicate features.

"Running out? I've got all of one month to find a boy and kiss him. That's practically all the time in the world," she said, displaying confidence that she did not feel inside.

A month was only thirty days. That was only seven hundred and twenty hours. And she would have to spend at least two hundred and forty hours sleeping, leaving a mere four hundred and eighty hours for studying, learning, Head Girl-ing and… hunting for her prey. Well, all that minus twenty-four now, because she had already wasted one precious day. She was such a procrastinator.

What was a girl to do with such little time?

---

Lily sat in the Prefect meeting the next Saturday — had one week and three days really gone by so quickly? — still on the look-out for a suitable boy to snog. But there was no one! Not one single male that she was okay with kissing.

Except for that chocolate-haired hunk of manliness sitting at the back of the room. Truth be told, Thomas was much better looking, but he would do. Oh, he definitely would do.

James kept on talking, lecturing the prefects on their poor behavior while making rounds at night.

Lily snorted. How could he stand there and lecture people about goofing up when that was clearly his area of expertise (excluding Transfiguration, of course).

"… completely inexcusable! Especially now, with the rise of that batty Dark wizard that's killing off everyone he sees. I'd've thought that you guys would have more common sense!"

James had a point, which Lily was very surprised to realize. When did he stop being so selfish?

"And around two weeks before the holidays, you guys will have to patrol the hallways more seriously than before, because more kids'll want to sneak out and go to Hogsmeade," said James. "And that could prove to be fatal."

Lily almost laughed out loud. James Potter was lecturing people about sneaking out of the castle? As if he didn't do it every week.

But that smoldering chocolate-y man-creature at the back… he didn't look like he snuck out too often.

What was his name again? Lily racked her brains. He was a seventh-year Hufflepuff, of that she was sure. But his name was on the tip of her tongue. It started with… an M. Or an A. Or maybe a C?

To her utmost delight, he thrust his hand up in the air.

"Question, Wolsten?"

WOLSTEN! Henry Wolsten, the dreamy Hufflepuff. She would never, ever forget his name again because he was her victim. They were lovers. He just didn't know it.

"So, what you're saying is something like we have to stay out late? That's how we're supposed to catch the hooligans, right?"

James patiently rolled his eyes.

"Well, not exactly," Lily interrupted. It was her first time speaking all meeting, so James turned and looked at her in surprise.

"Huh?" came the smart response from Henry.

"We're just saying instead of just leisurely strolling the corridors, search in the nooks and crannies and check the areas around the exits. That's all. It might take a little longer, but that's life, right?"

Henry nodded a little, and Lily winked at him. A not-so-secret wink that for some odd reason sent James into a fury. A fury that led to him confronting her after the meeting.

"What was that about?" he demanded as the Prefects filed out of the room.

"What was what?" asked Lily, genuinely confused.

"That — that wink! What're you doing, flirting with guys during meetings? It looks bad."

Lily felt anger rising up from her toes. It was the anger she reserved for James Potter, and him alone. She tried to swallow it, but it wasn't really working. "Well, what do you care if I look bad or not?" she snapped, narrowing her emerald green eyes.

"It looks bad for the _both_ of us, seeing how we're the two Heads!" he shot back.

"I fail to see how _anything_ in my life concerns you at all!" she retorted, picking her bag up.

James opened his mouth to angrily reply, but she promptly gathered her belongings and left the room. In the corridor, she heard him yell something, presumably something nasty aimed at her, but she didn't pay attention. After all, who was James Potter to her, anyway? He was an annoyance, that's what he was. Why should she care what he thought?

Shaking her head, Lily cleared her head of any thoughts relating to James. By doing that, she felt less like a birch and more like the pine tree she was supposed to be. And by feeling like a pine, she was ready to go get her victim.

She had to go snog someone and she had to do it soon. And James wasn't about to stop her.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: There's a tiny bit of LJ action in this chapter. I apologize for the lack of fluff and… well, interaction between the two. Even though there's not a lot, it's better than nothing, right? Whee!**

**Also… happy holidays to everyone!**

**PS. Don't forget to review!**

**DISCLAIMER: I didn't create Harry Potter because I'm not JK Rowling, I don't have any legal rights to any of the merchandise, yadda yadda yadda. Everyone knows that drill, right? Good. **

"He's… okay."

Lily practically flipped. Her green eyes opened wide and her glossed lips parted in shock. McKenna thought Henry was _okay_. Just _okay_. What an insult! How on earth could perfection be only _okay_? McKenna was so clearly jealous. She was jealous of Lily's stunningly hot and perfect and better-than-just-okay boyfriend. Well, almost boyfriend.

Actually, it was more like never-spoken-to-but-in-her-head-they-were-together boyfriend.

But that would all change as soon as Lily worked up the nerve to get her arse over there and snog him. He would probably be so stunned that the gorgeous, witty and wonderful Head Girl wanted him that he would willingly oblige and sweep her off her feet and carry her off into the sunset in a blaze of passion.

Except, even Lily admitted that that would never ever happen because a) she was too nervous, b) she wasn't very gorgeous or wonderful (even though she _was_ fabulously witty) and c) Henry didn't look like he could lift her up with his spindly arms.

Why hadn't she noticed his spindliness before?

But she couldn't tell McKenna that. Instead, she closed her mouth and said, "Shut up, you cow."

Her friend just rolled her hazel eyes and put another piece of roasted chicken on her plate. "Lily, I'd like you to take a good look at that boy," she said calmly.

Lily willingly obeyed. It wasn't like she didn't look at him every chance she got, anyway.

"I'd like you to note the fact that his nose is slightly off-centre."

What? No, that wasn't possible. She was wrong. She had to be wrong. But just in case, Lily squinted and took a closer look. And then she gasped in horror.

It _was_ off-centre.

How was that even possible? Henry Wolsten was sex-on-a-stick! He was the sexy man-creature! He was Lily's never-spoken-to-but-in-her-head-they-were-together boyfriend!

Lily shook her head as if to clear it of her oh-so horrible thoughts.

"I — I think you're seeing things," she lied feebly. "But in any case, who cares if it's just a teeny-weeny bit off-centre? It's hardly noticeable. And even if it is, I don't care. It doesn't take anything away from his perfection, except his symmetry, which really wasn't even important in the first place. Because he's still gorgeous and spindly —"

McKenna stopped buttering her toast and looked at Lily, her eyebrows raised to an abnormal height. "Spindly?"

Groaning, Lily mentally smacked herself. She wished she could rip off her traitorous mouth. She would have, too, if she didn't have to kiss Henry with it. Stupid, stupid mouth.

"His arms are on the skinny side," she finally said. Her tone of voice made it sound like his arms were covered in green, oozing boils.

"Hmm, you're right," McKenna noted, glancing at Henry casually.

"But it's not that bad," Lily argued. "I mean it's like his nose. Hardly noticeable. "

"Ri-ight."

"I'm serious. I know his arms aren't like Potter's or anything but they're not that bad."

"Excuse me?"

James had waltzed behind her at the exact moment she proclaimed he had nice arms to the entire world.

It really wasn't Lily's day.

"You know, Evans," he smirked, "I don't know whether I should feel flattered or violated that you like to look at me."

Occasionally, a girl just wants the floor to open up and swallow her whole. Since Lily couldn't think of a clever comeback, she sincerely wished just that. Her entire day was ruined because of Potter. And on top of that, she had just discovered that she wasn't as witty as she had originally thought.

She was so definitely not feeling very pine-y.

---

Charms was Lily's favourite class. It was what she looked forward to all week long. In that class, she was in her element. She could out-charm anyone she knew (with the exception of her professors and Dumbledore, of course), and it was a fact she was proud of.

So why was she so deathly bored?

She thought she had the answer. Ever since yesterday's dinner, Henry had been the only thing on her mind. He was the only thing she could think about. Him and his spindly arms and off-centre nose. She was, in all actuality, dying to get another good look at him—this time from up close—to see if she could deal with his nose.

"… This spell was made in Mesopotamia in the fifth century AD," said Flitwick. Now, does anyone want to tell me why the ancient Mesopotamians would have needed such a spell, and why it's still useful today? Ah, okay, Mister Lupin?"

Lily felt her mind wander. She didn't particularly care about the spell — most uncharacteristic of her. She looked down at her desk; dully noting that her parchment had ink stains all over before realizing there was an unfamiliar piece of paper sitting on top of it. Curiously, and ever so discreetly, she unfolded it and immediately noticed James' scrawl.

_Pay attention, Evans._

What was with people giving her pointless notes these days? Didn't they realize that she had more important things to do with her time, such as mooning over her now imperfect eye candy?

Frustrated and thoroughly pissed, she grabbed her quill and scribbled a response back: _What's it to you?_ She threw it over the heads of her fellow classmates and managed to hit James square on the forehead. Smiling in satisfaction, she turned back around.

Within a minute, she found another folded up note on her desk. Opening it up, she almost smiled.

_Just making sure you're alive. I know you don't like to fall behind. What, you going to kill me now for being concerned?_

How considerate of him. Almost too considerate. If she weren't so preoccupied, she would've been suspicious. Unfortunately, Henry Wolsten and his spindly arms were occupying her mind.

Lily groaned and let her head flop onto her desk. When did she get so… shallow? Lily Evans was not a shallow person. Or at least she never used to be. But then perfect Thomas had to come along and mess up her life…

Thomas. It was his fault. Him and his stupid perfection. She felt the need to one-up him. Her new boyfriend (even if he was only in her head) had to be even _more_ perfect. He had to be suave, handsome, athletic, smart, witty…

Kind of like James Potter.

Lily's head flew off her desk and clapped her hands over her mouth. She did _not_ just think that. There was no way in the world that just happened.

"I'm going to be sick," Lily blurted out before running out of the room.

"Are you okay, Lily?" she faintly heard someone ask as she made a mad dash out of the room. It was most definitely a male's voice. She thought it might have been James, but then realized that the voice probably only sounded like James because she was so shocked at herself for thinking about James Potter in _that way_.

If she only knew how right she was…


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: GAH! Sorry about the incredibly long wait for this chapter! I don't really have a good excuse. I was thinking about writing that I had exams, but those were over about two weeks ago. And I end school at one and come home with virtually no homework. So I guess my excuse is that I'm just an extremely lazy person. But I'm sorry!**

**And also, thanks to all my lovely reviewers! I love you all!**

**DISCLAIMER: I didn't create Harry Potter because I'm not JK Rowling, I don't have any legal rights to any of the merchandise, yadda yadda yadda. Everyone knows that drill, right? Good. **

"I am a gorgeous creature," declared Lily, gazing at her reflection in the mirror.

Just then, the dormitory door crashed open and Emmeline stood in the doorframe, an amused smile playing at the corners of her mouth. "Sorry?" she asked playfully.

Embarrassed but aware that all her roommates already she thought she was a nutcase—albeit a funny, lovable one—she decided to play up what she said. "Oh, yes, Emmeline, darling. I am hot stuff."

Emmeline chortled. "That you are. Mind telling me why you're dressed as a slag?"

Lily examined herself once more. Emmeline was right. She looked like a slag — but an attractive slag. Her mouth was painted, her eyes were lined and her cheeks rouged. She wore a tight black shirt with a v-shaped neckline that maybe swooped down a _little_ too much. But it didn't matter that much anyway. It's not like Lily was over endowed in the chest area.

"It's not too smutty, is it, Emma?" she asked, nervously turned around and looking at the tight bell-bottomed jeans.

Ignoring her, the tall blonde asked, "Where're you going, anyway?"

Picking up an eyelash curler, Lily responded with, "I have a date with destiny."

"Pardon?"

"She has a rendezvous with a man," McKenna announced, barreling into the room with an unusual amount of energy.

"You're seducing a guy, Lily?" Emmeline asked, her voice filled with shock.

"No!" cried Lily. "It's just Henry Wolsten."

"You're seducing _Wolsten_? Do you even know him?"

"No—yes. Well, sort of. I noticed him about a week ago. Tonight I'm going to—"

"You slut! I'm so proud…"

"It's not like _that_!"

"Sure, Lily." Emmeline rolled her eyes.

Lily was shocked into silence. She slowly turned around and glared at McKenna who was rolling on the floor with silent mirth. Slowly, wiping tears form her eyes; McKenna pulled herself into a sitting position.

"Now, now, let's not jump to conclusions," she said, grinning widely. "Lily's just going to meet Henry for a nice little snog."

"WHAT? You don't even know him, Lils!"

"I know…" started Lily with caution.

Emmeline opened her mouth to speak again, but Lily cut her off. "It's not like that, though. I'm not like that. I have a bet going on with Miss I-can't-stop-laughing-at-my-friend's-pain over there." She sat down on her bed and took a deep breath in. Letting it out slowly, she said, "Ever since Thomas and I split, I've been in a bit of a man-slump—"

"I noticed."

"We all have!"

"Sod off, McKenna. Anyway. Then McKenna McEvil bet me that I couldn't snog a guy within a month. If I don't, I have to make out with whomever McKenna chooses for me. So I accepted the challenge like the gallant and noble lady I am and I've decided that the gorgeous, smoldering Henry Wolsten will be _the one_. He has to be. Time's running out! I've wasted two weeks already…"

"D'you think she's on drugs?" Emmeline looked over at McKenna.

"Every day, Emmeline. Every single bloody day."

Lily huffed. She couldn't just stand around listening to her friends make fun of her. Time was running out. There were only two weeks left. And there was a man to be caught.

Lily marched up and down the many corridors of Hogwarts — especially the ones by the Hufflepuff common room (ah, the perks of being Head Girl!) — searching for her prey. She had decided that leaving her room as soon as possible was the best course of action. Her roommates were driving her nutters.

Her hunt should have been an exhilarating time. Her primal human instincts should have taken over and she should have had an adrenaline rush. But all she could think about was how uncomfortably tight her jeans were and how they must have given her huge love-handles…

_Thump_.

Lily staggered as she felt the impact of walking into something quite solid, like a brick wall only fleshier. It was also unnervingly familiar, like she'd felt that flesh-covered brick wall before.

"Thomas!" she breathed out, drinking in his stupendous beauty with her eyes.

He really was stupendously beautiful. His mousy brown hair was all tousled and his perfectly formed lips were plump but reddish and his honey-coloured eyes sparkled in the firelight. He looked positively delicious except for his clothes. They were all wrinkled and creased and his buttons were mismatched…

Lily gaped. What on earth had he been doing?

"'Lo, Lily," he said cordially. "What are you doing here?"

She gazed at him in wonder. "I was just about to ask you the same question."

"Er, well, I…" he trailed off, shifting his weight uncomfortably. "I was just, er, I walked Allison back to her common room."

Allison? Who was Allison? She was about to ask when another figure from behind her called out, "Hey, Thomas!"

Thomas looked over Lily's shoulder, looking very relieved. "Potter," he acknowledged. "What's up?"

James walked up to the Ravenclaw boy and exchanged a manly sort of handshake complete with grunts and a snap at the end. Lily felt the beginnings of a headache. Since when were the love of her life and her enemy friends? Since when did they even talk? In the eight months Lily went out with Thomas, she had never heard him utter the name "James Potter" unless it was Quidditch-related, like, "Geez. I really want to kick Potter's arse in the next Ravenclaw-Gryffindor match" or "Wow. Potter's a really good Chaser."

So why were they acting so buddy-buddy?

"I was outside, practicing Quidditch with the team," James informed him. "We're getting ready for the match. I think we've got what it takes to take you down," he boasted, referring to the Ravenclaw-Griffindor match that would take place in a few weeks' time.

Thomas snorted. "You wish."

"Don't even start," James warned, grinning. "I don't think you could beat Gryffindor if I had my hands tied behind my back."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. Judging by your… er, haphazard state, I'd say you were having a lot more _fun_ than practicing," James teased.

Thomas flushed and muttered, "Yeah, well you know Allison…"

Lily's mouth dropped. Allison. Allison was the reason for Thomas' tousled hair and red-stained lips. She was probably the reason for the mismatched buttons as well. She probably did Thomas' buttons up herself, the stupid twit.

"Is she your girlfriend?" she asked in a very soft voice. She was feeling very weak all of a sudden. Did Thomas have a new serious girlfriend, or just a friend with benefits?

James turned around, surprised. "Evans? What're you doing here?" he asked rudely.

Lily reddened. "What do you mean? I was _clearly_ here before you so rudely interrupted my conversation with Thomas!"

"Well, sorry that you're not too noticeable. Even with all that flaming hair, you're surprisingly easy to miss, you know."

"What the hell are you going on about, Potter? If I'm that easy to miss, why do you always notice and get on my case about looking at guys?"

James stood there for a moment, his mouth agape. Lily smiled smugly, knowing that she got under his skin. Well, it served him right for always prying into her business.

"What are you talking about, Evans?" he spluttered out. He seemed to be at a loss for words, but his face was unreadable and stoic. He crossed his arms and leaned against the cold wall trying to look cool.

Lily almost snorted at his pathetic-ness.

"Don't you remember when you lectured me about looking at Henry Wolsten in the Prefect meeting? You told me not to flirt with him? You turned really red then. Almost as red as you are now," she said, enjoying the way his face was getting redder and redder with each passing second.

"You've got it completely wrong! I wasn't doing it for _you, _Evans," James said, taking a few steps forward. "He's too good for you."

"_Excuse me?_" she gasped.

"Oh, ouch," Thomas commented.

"You heard me," responded James nonchalantly to Lily's remark. He looked at her square in the eye and smirked.

Lily's headache blossomed until it felt like her brain was pulsing against the sides of her skull. "You stupid, arrogant prick! Who are you to decide something like that? Do you not remember how you used to ask me out everyday _straight_ for months on end?"

James took another step closer. "Do you realize that I stopped after I realized how snooty you are?"

"Do _you_ realize that I don't give a damn what you think?"

"Um, guys?" Thomas tried to interject. But the Head Boy and Girl didn't pay him any attention.

Suddenly, James' hands hit the wall with a resounding _thud_. He looked down at her and even though his messy hair hiding half his eye, Lily could see the intensity he looked at her with. He opened his mouth to say something — probably a rude, snide comment — when an unfamiliar voice said, "Wow. You two have a lot of sexual tension."

James jumped back as Lily whirled her head around and her jaw dropped yet again. Henry Wolsten was standing in the corridor in all his chocolate-haired, sex-on-a-stick-y splendour. She couldn't believe what she was seeing. What did the karma gods have against her? Was it not enough that her ex-boyfriend and her mortal enemy were all of a sudden very buddy-buddy and that said enemy had just taken her pine-y self esteem and crushed into a very fine powder under his heartless, soulless heel? Now her seductee had to barge in on the scene and announce that he thought her and JAMES POTTER had sexual tension between them?

What was wrong with the world? Everyone was so clearly insane. Or, at the very least, Henry Wolsten was certifiably crazy. He would no longer do as her snogging partner. Sadly, Lily gave him one last look, drinking in his hunkiness. Examining his spindly arms and his off-centre nose.

No, no. He just would not do.

"All three of you are insane," she mumbled, rubbing her temples. "Right off your rockers."

Feeling emotionally drained with an exceptional headache, she began to plod her way back to Gryffindor Tower without saying another word. Her night was an unqualified disaster. So much time had been wasted on Henry Wolsten…

Time. Lily didn't have any time to waste. She only had two weeks left to snog a guy and triumph over McKenna. She had wasted TWO WEEKS of her life on a lunatic who thought she and James Potter had sexual tension.

What a bugger.

But still. As Lily walked, she began to think of prospective victims. She mentally went over a list of all the seventh-year boys, making a pro-and-con list for each and every single one. When she reached the portrait of the Fat Lady, her headache was ebbing away because she finally knew who Victim Number Two was.

The portrait swung open and a tall, sandy-haired boy ambled out.

Speak of the devil…

Lily's mouth curved into a flirtatious smile and called out, "Hey, Remus! How are you?"


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: I know, I know, I know. It's been such a long time since my last update – I suck at this game. But at least I'm admitting it. And truthfully, I had no excuse. Except I started working. It's only a part-time job but sometimes I work about four days in a row from either 6:00-11:00 or 4:00-12:00. And on top of that I have school. So… I guess I sort of do have an excuse. But I get out of school every day at 1:00 so that hardly counts. I guess I should stop writing about my life story because I'm sure nobody really cares. And I'm just going to apologize for it being so late. So I'm sorry!**

**Also, thanks to all the reviewers. Honestly. Every time I get a review I smile and feel better about myself.**

**DISCLAIMER: I didn't create Harry Potter because I'm not JK Rowling, I don't have any legal rights to any of the merchandise, yadda yadda yadda. Everyone knows that drill, right? Good. **

When Lily was younger, her ideal man always had sandy hair and was good-looking in an understated way. In her daydreams, he was quiet and pensive, but had an excellent sense of humour and was quite intelligent.

Oh, all right. In reality, Lily's ideal man had always been tall, dark and handsome. But now, Lily's ideal man wasn't like that at all because in her mind he had morphed into the one and only Remus Lupin.

At Lily's greeting, Remus gave her a warm smile. "I'm good, how are you?" he asked, the picture of politeness.

"Not too bad," she replied, taking a step closer to him as her heart began to beat furiously in her chest. "Er, where are you off to?" she asked. Then she mentally kicked herself. She sounded way to eager, way to desperate.

But Remus didn't seem to notice. "I'm just on my way to Quidditch practice. I'm supposed to meet James, Sirius and Peter there."

"Oh." There was a lull in the conversation. Lily was thinking about James. If he was on his way to the Quidditch pitch, why would he have been by the Hufflepuff common room?

"Were you walking this way?" Remus asked, breaking her train of thought.

"Pardon?" Lily's head began to spin. Her mind was emptying all thoughts of James and his suspicious doings and was replacing then with thoughts of Remus and his deliciousness. Was he going to profess his attraction for her now by asking her to walk with him?

"Well," he began, "you're walking with me right now, and I was just wondering if I was leading you away from anything important."

Lily hadn't noticed that they had begun to move. It was so natural that Lily was certain that Remus was the right choice to be her victim. He would make such a good boyfriend.

"Lily?" he pressed gently.

He was so polite!

"Oh, I never do anything important anyway."

Lily could have kicked herself. Why did she have to go and say the stupidest thing in the world right in front of her current flavour-of-the-week? Why did her brain suddenly shut down right when she needed a good excuse that was flirtatious but not too obvious? Stupid, stupid brain. So very un-piney.

"Pardon?" he asked with an amused look gracing his adorable features.

"Erm, yeah," she said, stalling for time. "I was going to go outside for a walk, anyway. But it's nicer to walk with someone," she lied, tossing her long red hair over her shoulder flirtatiously.

Remus flushed. "You flatter me," he said almost uncomfortably.

Lily giggled. He was so cute! "I'm good at that."

"So," he started, clearing his throat, "you look nice tonight." He fidgeted with the collar of his shirt.

Lily flushed. She completely forgot that she was dressed quite differently than she normally did. She flushed even deeper as she remembered _why_ she was dolled up. Pushing that recent, somewhat hideous memory aside, she focused all of her energy and her inner flirt on Remus and the way he kept on glancing her way before pretending as if he had never looked at her.

She couldn't help noticing how nervous she made him. He tugged at his collar an awful lot and he kept on clearing his throat. She liked that he wasn't a womanizer and that he wasn't suave. He had an innocence about him that made her want to kiss him…

In a split second, Lily knew that she would win her bet tonight. She would kiss Remus, and then perhaps they could start going out. That would make James so jealous and angry.

She did love baiting James a lot. It was one of her favourite pastimes, just like screaming at him. But she wouldn't use Remus to get under James' skin. She wasn't that manipulative or mean. She really and honestly liked him at that moment.

But she needed a hint. She needed to know that Remus liked her too. Something that was a definite sign that he wanted to snog her as much as she did…

"So, what have you been up to, Lils?"

That was sign enough for her. He so obviously cared about her, what she did in her spare time, how she was coping with the stress of being Head Girl and stuff. And he felt comfortable enough around her to call her "Lils". He wanted her _so bad_.

"Er, you know, the usual. What about you?"

"Same. I thought life would be a little bit more exciting in seventh year. But it's really not," he told her, looking at the wall.

His body language was screaming out, "TAKE ME!"

Lily could hardly contain herself. Just as she was about to pounce on him, he turned to her and said, "Well, I guess this is where we have to split. It was nice talking to you!" and walked away.

Then there was silence.

And more silence.

The silence never seemed to end because try as she might, Lily couldn't fully process what had just happened. She stood there with her mouth agape and her brow furrowed. Had she just been blown off? Or was he just so attracted to her that he couldn't help but be flustered and nervous in her presence?

She made her way up to Gryffindor Tower in a daze. Confusion never suited Lily well. It usually made her frustrated and spaced out. Which was probably why she told McKenna _everything_ as soon as she was bombarded with questions as she entered her dormitory.

"Who'd you snog?" McKenna fairly pounced on her best friend upon her entrance.

"No one."

"What? What happened to Wolsten?" That was Emmeline, always ready to be in on the gossip.

"LILY SNOGGED SOMEONE?" her other roommate called from behind the closed bathroom door.

Lily groaned inwardly. Why was everyone so nosy? Couldn't they just let her be?

"SPILL THE JUICE, LILS!"

"Yeah, who'd you kiss?"

"Was it hot?"

"Was it wet?"

"Ew! Why would kisses be wet, McKenna?" There was a pause. Then,

"EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! Oh, that's just _wrong!_"

"Getting back on topic… how was it, Lily?"

Lily climbed into bed, not worrying about washing off her makeup, or changing into her pyjamas or caring that it was only around eight o'clock. "I… I couldn't do it."

There was a collective sigh at the lack of gossip and her roommates seemed to lose interest at this point. They drifted off, doing whatever they were doing before Lily had come back except McKenna. She made her way over to Lily's four-poster bed, drew the curtains and cast a soundproofing spell. Then McKenna reached into her jeans pocket and drew out a chocolate frog as she said one word: "Talk."

And the whole story came pouring out. Meeting Thomas when he was freshly dishevelled from fooling around with Allison and how that almost wrenched her heart out, then encountering James who called her unnoticeable and snobbish—which hurt her, even if she wouldn't ever admit it out loud—and then seeing Henry who said that she and James had sexual tension and then talking to Remus who kept on sending her mixed signals.

"So really, it's just been a tiring and confusing day. I think I deserve a little rest and relaxation, don't you?" she said, finishing her story off.

Instead of offering any sort of advice or comforting words, McKenna was fixated with one tiny, irrelevant part of the tale.

"So, sexual tension, eh?"

Lily's face began to flame. "Shut up," she moaned miserably before pushing her best friend off of the bed and bottom-first onto the hard stone ground.

---

In Potions the following morning, Lily couldn't pay any attention to Slughorn even though the lesson seemed to be rather interesting. She kept on sneaking glances behind her, admiring the way Remus sparkled in the dim dungeon light. She also really liked his smile because his teeth were really straight. And she made sure to check out his nose… and it wasn't off-centre at all. Score one for Team Lily!

She also couldn't help but notice that James' nose was rather attractive as well. She kind of liked his smile, too.

Only she _didn't_ just think that. She _couldn't _have just thought that. She and James were sworn enemies. Henry's comment about their so-called sexual tension was getting to her. She was going crazy.

It was the only logical explanation.

Feeling the need to get her confused—and disgusted—mind off of boys for a while, Lily focused her attention on the professor and take notes. She really did take excellent notes. Everything was colour coordinated and her writing was very neat. As Slughorn paused to write something on the board behind him, Lily held up her parchment, admiring how nice her notes were.

Laughter rang out from the back of the room. Lily recognized the voice: Sirius Black. And if Black was laughing, it was a safe bet that a) the rest of his goofy friends were amused as well therefore Remus would be smiling his sweet, sweet smile or b) James and Peter would be the only other ones laughing while Remus shook his head in exasperation.

Lily felt sorely tempted to turn around and catch a glimpse James' — no — R_emus' _smile (if he was smiling). She was about to turn around when Slughorn said, "Settle down, boys" as something hit the back of her head: a piece of parchment that was crumpled into a ball.

What was it with people and throwing parchment at her head? What did her head ever do to them?

Lily's head spun around so fast, her long red hair whipped McKenna in the face. She saw James and his cronies sitting in the very back row, all of them smiling—even though Remus' seemed slightly apologetic.

How sweet!

As she turned back around, she swiftly swooped down and grabbed the parchment ball. She smoothed it out in her lap as quietly as possible, hoping that it would be a love note from Remus. To her disappointment, she immediately recognized the writing to be James'.

_Why do you keep staring at me? Want to unleash some of that sexual tension?_

Lily felt the blood rush to her cheeks. James really needed to stop being so open and perverted.

She couldn't turn back around to stick her tongue out at James and possibly give him an evil look because her face just _wouldn't_ return to its normal colour. The longer she sat there, the more she thought about the note. And thinking about the note made her blush deeper and deeper. And that just made her angrier and angrier. So by the end of class, Lily was filled with embarrassment and anger. When those two emotions mix, nothing good ever happens.

Ever.

Lily couldn't have been more relieved that class was over. She slowly shoved things into her bag, waiting for the room to empty and the professor to leave before sinking down into her seat and letting out a strangled, embarrassed cry.

"Aw, look! Ickle Lilykins is all hot and bothered!" James laughed loudly. He smirked at her and pushed his way out of the classroom.

Well, she hadn't been aware of his presence in the room. _That_ was an unpleasant surprise.

"Sod off," she called out after him.

Upon hearing that, James turned around and stepped back into the dungeon, an annoying smug smirk still on his face. "You're more _bothered_ than I originally thought. Can't say I'm surprised, though. You're nutters."

"Oh, I'm so _insulted_," snapped Lily with biting sarcasm. She was becoming increasingly aware of the fact that James' friends were waiting for him in the corridor, probably catching every single word that was exchanged.

"Nice comeback," he taunted. "Real witty. I'm just so blown away by your _intelligence_. Although, coming into contact with it has left me somewhat disappointed. Cripes, Evans. You're going downhill and frankly I don't know if anything—magic or _Muggle—_can help you now."

That hurt. The way he made a quick jab at her heritage, at her family. She used to sort of respect him because, although he was from a pureblooded family, he never seemed to think that Muggles and Muggle-borns were below him. She thought that he treated them with the same respect he gave every other person (save Snape). But now… but now…

She was surprised at how much his little dig about her being Muggle-born bothered her. She shouldn't care what he thought of her. She _didn't_… or at least, she never used to.

With her green eyes flashing with confusion and anger, she closed the distance between them, took aim and slapped him quite loudly and smartly on the cheek.

A stunned silence ensued until James finally said, "_What_ was that?"

"You're disgusting," she replied, struggling to keep her voice low and even. "No — you're worse that that. I can't believe that you could sink so low. I used to almost _respect_ you. Now, I can't even begin to imagine why. Taking what I am and shoving in my face, expecting me to take it like an insult? That's petty and cruel and _exactly like_ the Slytherins you claim to hate so much."

James' eyes widened and he opened his mouth, probably to refute or protest, but Lily wasn't done.

"You sicken me!" she cried. "You're a sham! It's all for show, isn't it, you two-faced idiot! All the countless times you stood there in front of me, pretending to be brave and stand up for me in front of the people who called me 'Mudblood'… You're a pathetic narrow-minded _slime bag_!

"You may think that my having Muggle parents is something to be ashamed of, but I don't. The only thing I'm ashamed of — really and truly ashamed of — is knowing you."

And with that, she pushed past him and stalked out of the room. Her mind was heavy with anger—and rightly so. But she also felt something unexpected: the hollow feeling of disappointment.

James had disappointed her. She was _so sure_ that he wasn't pigheaded and ignorant. She thought that she had at least known _that_ much about him. How could he be so hypocritical, is what she wanted to know. How could he let her down like that?

"Stupid, bloody prat," mumbled Lily under her breath. She was talking about—who else? —James. His comment bothered her even then, hours later, as she sat in the library working on her Charms essay. "Bleeding imbecile," she muttered before turning the page of the rather musty volume she was leafing through and scanned the page.

_The _Securitas_ charm—or the inhibition charm—is not particularly difficult to cast, although it is difficult to master. If done properly, however, the recipient loses all of his/her inhibition and promptly gains peace of mind and confidence. However, if it is not cast properly, the recipient of the spell gains a false sense of confidence, which leads to over-confidence. This can be highly embarrassing and disastrous if the person under the spell attempts… anything. They will go about it with vigour and zest but will fail miserably leading to public humiliation at the very least. Unless, of course, the public is very accepting, in which case the humiliation will probably not be so great. Unfortunately, most general publics are not so understanding…_

"What I wouldn't give to get the chance to cast _this_ charm on Potter," she grumbled, taking notes like the good student she was.

"That's nice, Lily," she heard a deep voice say from somewhere up above her.

She craned her neck to see who the speaker was; pleasantly surprised to see that it was Remus Lupin. She could put her flirting skills to action.

"Well, I'm a nice person," she said, gesturing for him to take the seat beside her with a large smile and a tilt of her head.

"Truth," he declared, raising his hands up in surrender. "But I'm sure you think James deserves more than just a _Securitas_ charm gone wonky."

"Truth," she declared, mimicking his earlier gesture. "Can you blame me though? He's a right git. I mean, I know he's one of your best friends—" she hastily added seeing his uncomfortable expression "—but he's so…"

"Frustrating?" suggested Remus when he saw she was at a loss for words that weren't too vulgar.

Lily laughed somewhat darkly. "That's one way of putting it." She smiled at Remus and tucked a stray strand of red hair behind her ears. "But you didn't come all the down here to talk to me about hurting James, did you?"

Remus shifted in his seat and seemed engrossed in a heavy volume about charms. "Actually," he said after taking in a deep breath, "I sort of did."

Once again she couldn't help but notice how nervous she made him. She smiled gently and placed a hand on his arm. She was racking her brain, thinking of something along the lines of, "Let's not worry about James right now. Let's worry about _us_" but not so desperate or eager.

"You know James didn't mean it Lily," he breathed out really quickly, still looking at the book. "I don't know why he said it, but he didn't mean it." He chanced a glance her way. "He's been beating himself up over it ever since you walked out on him."

"Well, he should be," she said hotly. "It was a pretty nasty thing to say, Remus."

"I know." He ran a hand through his hair as if he was frustrated. Frustrated at her or James, Lily couldn't help but wonder.

"You know?" she asked, gently prodding him on.

"'Course I do!" He stopped touching his hair and looked at her with those big, earnest eyes. Such sweet, sweet eyes. Lily could feel herself being drowned in them. "He shouldn't have said it; especially not to you, Lily. I don't know why he did, and I don't know why he said it to _you_, the smartest and most capable witch in our year. I know he thinks that, too and he's really just one great big idiot, but he's an idiot with a conscience and I know, _I know_ that he's too proud to say sorry so I'm here saying for him."

But Lily had stopped listening after he admitted that he thought she was one of the best in their year. It was such a huge compliment that she couldn't help but blush. And the fact that the compliment came from _his_ mouth made her want to jump him.

When Lily didn't respond, Remus looked at her with questioning eyes. "Are you okay, Lily? You're looking a little flushed—"

In one brazen movement, Lily cupped his face in her hands and scooted closer to him. Her eyes were shut tightly and she quickly closed the distance in between them so that their lips met in a kiss.

It was perfect! Lily marvelled at the softness of his lips—she hadn't known that they would feel so _nice_ under her own. It was such a nice kiss, so reminiscent of the wonderful pine tree she knew was sprouting at that exact moment somewhere in the world—perhaps in Canada, she heard that there were lots of pines there—that she didn't notice how rigid he was until she slowly moved her head away.

He stared at her for an eternity, although in reality it was probably only a few seconds. But Lily waited for his reaction with bated breath.

Quickly and awkwardly, Remus stood up, his chair making a horrible scratchy noise on the cold stone floor. "You… I… er, I'm sorry, Lily. But that was a mistake," he said, sounding like he was going to die or something. And then he ran out of the library as fast as he could.

Lily blinked a few times before hitting her head on the table, mentally kicking herself.

And somewhere a pine tree was dying.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Well, this is update came kind of sort of quickly. But of course, there are consequences to that, the first of which being that I don't really like this chapter. It's very random, very nonsensical and very choppy. But I do think that the ending is okay – I _hope_ it's okay!**

**Again, thanks to all the reviewers! I'm really pleased at how this story is received. Thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you!**

**DISCLAIMER: I didn't create Harry Potter because I'm not JK Rowling, I don't have any legal rights to any of the merchandise, yadda yadda yadda. Everyone knows that drill, right? Good. **

The door to the dormitory flung open, revealing a rather flustered Lily on the other side. "I've just won the bet," she announced.

McKenna jumped up, her mouth agape and eyes wide. She seemed to forget how to breathe as face was getting slight blue. After a full minute she took a deep breath in and screamed, "YOU WHAT?"

Lily winced. Why did McKenna have to speak so _loudly_? She fidgeted and perched on the foot of McKenna's bed.

"I can't believe it! You actually did it… you _snogged a boy_!" McKenna was saying in a voice full of wonder.

"Is that so hard to believe?" Lily was getting a little bit irritated.

McKenna gave her friend a look that very plainly said, _what, are you kidding me?_ Lily snorted and leaned on one of the bed posts. She examined her nails casually… too casually…

"Alright, missy, you tell me what's up right now or else I will hex you," McKenna suddenly said giving Lily a stern look.

Lily looked up, surprise and guilt evident in her clear green eyes. "Pardon?" she asked, acting innocent.

Her friend didn't listen to her. Instead, she grabbed Lily's arm and dragged out of bed, out of the dormitory, past their gaping roommates, out of the tower and into the corridor. There, McKenna finally released Lily's arm from her grasp

"What are you _doing?_" whined Lily. She rubbed her arm tenderly; McKenna was surprisingly strong for someone so small.

"I want to know what happened. It's obvious that you actually didn't kiss someone and it's like you're trying to get out of the bet… which, by the way, I'm not going to let you do. So you better just say whatever's on your mind or else I'll slip you some Veritaserum so you'll _have_ to tell me."

Lily stared at her with wide, wondering eyes.

"What?" asked McKenna.

"Why am I friends with someone as psychotic as you?"

McKenna waved her hand impatiently. "Are you ever going to _tell _me what's going on?"

Lily sighed and closed her emerald green eyes. "Let's go for a walk," she suggested.

"A walk sounds excellent!"

The redhead had to roll her eyes and her friend's cheeky enthusiasm. Life just wouldn't be the same if McKenna acted any less… strange.

The two friends walked the corridors in silence. Their shoes made loud, echo-y clacking noises and the torches cast eerie shadows on the grey stone walls. They had travelled a long way from Gryffindor tower before Lily opted to break the silence.

"I kissed Remus, you know." Her eyes were downcast and she looked oddly vulnerable.

McKenna decided to forego her usual whoop of congratulations and stayed silent—a very rare occurrence indeed. It didn't seem like Lily wanted or needed to be congratulated about anything. Her gesture didn't go unnoticed. Lily nodded her head appreciatively and continued. "But it wasn't a snog or anything like that. It was just a quick little kiss."

There was another long pause. This time, however, McKenna was too curious not to break it. "And?" she pressed.

"He kind of looked at me after pulling away and said, 'Sorry, Lils. You're out of you bloody mind!'"

"Is this Remus Lupin we're talking about?"

"Well," added Lily hastily, "he didn't use those words exactly."

"I didn't think so."

"But that was the gist of it. And then he ran away."

Lily looked at the floor. She felt so embarrassed and stupid and naïve and just so unlike Lily, the calm, composed one. Who would have known that agreeing to the stupid bet would lead to such… such… low times?

"Let's go to the kitchens," McKenna announced suddenly.

Lily blinked her green eyes in surprise. "What?"

"What you need, m'dear, is some junk food and butterbeer in your system. It'll perk you up instantly and make you forget about all your troubling boy-woes!" she said, arms open wide.

Without waiting for a response, McKenna grabbed Lily's hand and dragged her down to the kitchens, laughing and shouting all the way.

"McKenna… stop! I need to breathe!" panted Lily as she trailed behind her friend.

"Not until you've had a few butterbeers!" she exclaimed.

The two teenaged girls reached the painting of fruit in record time. McKenna quickly tickled the pear and stepped into the cavernous room. Little house elves were working busily, washing pots and pans and making tea and scones. As Lily and McKenna entered, a female elf dressed in the toga-like contraption came up to them.

"Cans I help you miss?" she offered sweetly in a nauseatingly high-pitched voice.

"Always so helpful. Have you any butterbeer?" McKenna asked, not wasting any time.

"Can't say we do, miss! Not today, miss."

"Right. Okay then," said McKenna, frowning.

Lily stood there, catching her breath. She was about to ask for some scones when McKenna interrupted her. "I know! Have you any cooking sherry?"

"McKenna!" Lily said, horror-struck.

The house elf shook her strange shaped head, bat-like ears flapping around. "Nay's the answer, miss. But we do gots the regular sherry. It makes for much better cooking, yous see," she said, leaning in secretively.

McKenna nodded solemnly. "Oh, I know. I was just telling my mum that in a letter the other day. It helps keep control over the saltiness of the food."

The elf's eyes widened in appreciation. "Ezackly right, miss!"

"Hm, you know what would be a good idea?"

"What would that be, miss?"

"Well," started McKenna leaning her back on the door nonchalantly. "I was thinking that maybe I could get a bottle of sherry to send my mum? You know, so that she could see the difference?"

Lily just stood off to the side throughout the whole exchange. She mouth was slightly agape. McKenna was harassing a house elf for _school_ alcohol. Not only that, McKenna knew what cooking sherry was!

"Waits just a second, miss! Dotty will be back!" the miniature creature called over her shoulder as she disappeared into a side room.

Lily walked over to where her friend was standing smugly. "Are you trying to get me _drunk_?" she hissed into her ear.

"Hey, you _need _this. You just got rejected and you didn't even win the bet. You're having a rough day."

Lily's mouth dropped open. "I did too win the bet. I kissed Remus, remember?"

"Ah, but a chaste kiss does not a snogging session make."

"But… but… that's not fair."

"Newsflash, ickle Lilykins: life is not fair."

She was about to say something back when the little elf came back with a bottle of sherry. Not wanting to make a huge spectacle of anything, she knew that it was best to leave McKenna to her own devices. So, silently, Lily worried about her friend's shenanigans right up until they were in their dormitory.

"You can't drink in there! There are _people_ in there!" Lily warned McKenna, but it was no use because she wasn't paying any attention. Instead, she wrenched the door open and purposely made her way over to the centre of the room.

"IS ANYONE HERE," she boomed.

There was no answer.

"Where is everyone?" asked Lily tentatively.

"Studying? Snogging? Shagging?" suggested McKenna. "Who cares? But it's not like they'd snitch on us. If they see us drinking, they'd probably want to join in."

Lily realized she couldn't refute the point. So she searched her mind for another reason not to drink the nicked sherry.

"I can't do this and you can't do it in front of me. I'm Head Girl!"

"You're also a teenager," McKenna pointed out.

It was irrefutable logic. Or, it was irrefutable to someone who secretly was dying to get rip-roaring drunk and forget about all their problems for a while. The innocent bottle filled with a not-so-innocent substance in McKenna's non-innocent hand seemed to be calling out to her. It was so tempting…

"Just one tiny sip," announced Lily, diving for the bottle.

One sip turned into five, which turned into ten, which turned into half to bottle.

"Boys—boy, oi! They rhyme! Boys are horrible," Lily slurred as her tongue felt too heavy to move properly.

"Really?" McKenna asked. Even though she had had as much alcohol as Lily, she was only slightly tipsy.

Lily shook her head, red hair flying. "Oh yes. Yes yes yes yesyesyes. Horbable. Horr… horrible. They're just poop."

"Why?"

"Because they don't let me kiss them!" she cried in frustration. "Or else they are mean like fish, except are fish mean? They can be like sharks. RWAR. Yes. They're mean like sharks because they call you names or the break your heart or the have uneven noses and skinny arms and… and… yes. SHARKY."

"Sharky? I think, Lily, that you're losing your mind."

"No I'm not. I'm just drunk!" She smiled brightly.

"Yeah, you are," McKenna conceded, grinning as well. "But you know, not all boys are poop."

"Yeah. James can be poopy sometimes, but he's pretty great, don't you think?"

Lily woke up the next morning with a nasty hangover. But, she decided, it was worth it. She had a good time the previous night. It was just what she needed. With the sherry, she flushed all the stupid boys out of her stupid system.

So a few days after her random drunken escapade, she went down to breakfast in a cheery mood only to receive a letter from Petunia that ruined _everything_.

_It's Petunia. I'm getting married to Vernon—you remember him, don't you? Of course, I don't suppose _your kind_ tends to forget many things, what with your freakish abilities and all. In any case, Mum's making me send you a formal invitation later when we decide on a date and everything… but I really don't think you should come. I mean, Vernon's like me: He's normal. And he hasn't heard of your… er, _abilities_ yet. I know I'll have to tell him sooner or later, but now just seems wrong. He'll probably leave me because I'm related to you. And his family's completely adverse to anything abnormal, which you are and they probably would hate me if you came to the wedding. So if you did come, it'd be really unwise. _

_Can't you please let me be on this _one day

Petunia 

Lily looked at the note in horror. Her own sister, her flesh and blood, hated her. Really and truly hated with a horrid passion in the pit of her soul. She didn't even want her sister to be there on her wedding day. She didn't want her sister to witness the happiest moment of her life. Sure, she said it was because of Vernon and his family, but Lily knew the truth: Petunia was ashamed of her. Petunia was afraid of her. Petunia didn't want her as a sister.

And that knowledge stung.

Angrily, Lily stuffed the note back into its envelope before running out of the Great Hall, oblivious to the curious stares thrown her way. She needed to find a place where she could vent out her anger in relative peace.

Knowing that everyone was at breakfast, Lily made her way up to Gryffindor Tower. She quickly muttered the password, _uppity whootie-who, _and cast a rather weak silencing charm on the common room before letting loose and screaming at the top of her lungs.

When she was finished she felt her anger ebb away. Feeling a bit relieved and a bit happier, she turned to leave only to find James Potter staring at her from the bottom of the boys' staircase with a very strange look on his face.

"Why are you spying on me?" She had said the first thing that came to mind after _oh, crap!_

James started. "Why _would_ I be spying on you, Evans?"

"I don't know, you tell me."

"Well, I wouldn't know because that sort of thing doesn't appeal to me."

"I'm sure it doesn't."

The two Heads stared at each other in a moment of stubborn silence.

James cleared his throat. "Er, mind telling me why you were screaming loud enough to wake the whole castle?"

"Is that any of your business?" she snapped, eyes narrowing to mere slits.

"I should bloody well think so!" he thundered indignantly. "You woke me up! I think I'm entitled to as least that."

Lily could feel the steam pouring out of her ears. "Back to that, are we?" she yelled. "You think you're _entitled_ to everything! You think that just because you're you and you're popular and smart and are a _Pureblood_ that you're so much better than everyone else and _deserve_ to know everything!"

James walked close to her, his gait dangerous. "_Pardon_?" he asked, his voice dripping with false politeness.

"You heard me," Lily shot back. "You think you're so high and mighty, but you're not! You think you're _entitled_ to this and _entitled _to that. You're such a smug bastard!"

"Well excuse me for trying to help you out!"

"You want to help me? You want to _help_ me!" she cried incredulously. "You've got to be joking! But fine, fine. You want to know what's wrong with me?" At this point, Lily was positively livid. Her face was about as red as the Hogwarts Express and she kind of felt like pulling her hair out. Or maybe it'd be better if she ripped James' out instead.

"It's not like you life could be so bad anyway," James spat out.

That sent Lily reeling. How did he know anything about her? How dare he presume that her life was great? How dare he assume that he knew her that well?

"My sister hates me. She hates me because I'm a witch and according to her I'm 'abnormal'. She doesn't even want me to go to her wedding! She's _ashamed_ of me, she's _scared_ of me and she wants to _hide _me! Do you know what it feels like to dread going home? Have you any idea what it feels like not being accepted into your own family because of something you can't even help?

"You know the saying 'you can't please everyone'? Well, I can't please ANYONE! Muggles don't like me because I'm a witch and witches and wizards hate me because I'm a Muggle-born! I don't think you, James Potter, could possibly even begin to fathom what it feels like being an outcast _everywhere_ you go! My sister and people like you here don't care that I get top marks or that I work my arse off to fit in with others. You guys are all so _ignorant_ and _simple-minded_ and _infuriating_ and _crass _and _cruel_ and at times it's TOO MUCH TO HANDLE!"

Finished with her speech, Lily stood there, breathing heavily. Light-headed and close to tears, she couldn't quite get her head around the fact that she had just spilled her heart and soul out to James Potter, her sworn enemy. She had admitted her greatest weakness and was sure she'd pay for it dearly later.

But she discovered that she really didn't care. It felt _good_ to get everything off of her chest. She felt something inside of her lift and she was left with a feeling akin to freedom.

James didn't seem to want to look her in the eye. Instead, he looked down at the ground and scuffed his shoe on the stone floor. "Listen, Lily," he began somewhat abashedly. The redhead automatically snapped out of her reverie and his use of her first name.

James continued to hit his shoe against the ground, not saying anything. Lily, tired of waiting said, "James, _what did you want?_"

The messy-haired teen stopped ruining his shoes and looked her square in the eye. He ran a hand through his hair—a gesture that usually annoyed Lily beyond words. But at that moment, she didn't seem to mind so much. Maybe it was because he looked so distraught, or maybe it was because she realized that his hair looked rather nice all faux-windswept.

"Nothing," he muttered, turning around. He began to walk up the staircase again

Lily could have screamed with frustration. Why was he being so unmanageable and… childish? Without stopping to think, Lily marched up to where he was and grabbed his elbow, forcing him to spin around.

"Hey!" he cried out in protest. "What are you doing, Evans?"

"Shut up," she told him, raising her hand to slap him. But before she could lower it to deliver the blow, he caught her wrist and made a tutting sound.

"Why do you always get the urge to hit me?" he asked somewhat disapprovingly.

"Why are you always so rude?" she shot back.

James looked mildly amused. "Well," he countered, "don't you think that slapping someone is a tiny bit rude?" He let go of her wrist and she slowly let it fall to her side.

Flustered, Lily couldn't think of a really witty comeback. So instead she blurted out, "I think _you're _rude."

She immediately winced and wished she hadn't said anything. James threw his head back and laughed uproariously. His stomach heaved, he was gasping for breath and his eyes were getting watery. "You—you're such a _kid,_ Evans!" he managed to say in between chuckles.

"_I'm_ a kid?" she asked, aghast. "_I_ am not childish! _You're_ childish! You're the one that pulls all those stupid pranks! I haven't done anything of the sort."

"I think _you're_ not anything of the sort," he said nonsensically. He really didn't care that he wasn't making any sense because bugging Lily gave him _that much_ delight.

"You're so aggravating!" she cried. She wanted to pull great tufts of hair out of her head and poke James' eyeballs out. Why was he being so annoying?

"I think _you're_ aggravating!"

"I think you should shut up and go away!"

"I think _you're_ the one in _my_ personal space."

Lily had to blink at that one. He went from being near hysterical to deadly serious in about zero-point-zero-one seconds flat. His eyes suddenly shone with a fierce intensity that she couldn't quite understand. She also didn't understand what he said right away. But after a moment, her cheeks heated and she realized just how close they were standing to each other.

"I… I'm… what?" she asked dumbly. But it was clear James wasn't listening to a word she said. Instead, he was looking at her with such concentration it was almost unnerving. It wasn't though. And when Lily's green eyes locked with James' hazel ones, she found herself somewhat entranced. His eyes looked so open…

Her emotions began to slush around. The usual disgust she felt whenever she was in his presence was still there. And so was the hurt she still felt from his snide comment on her heritage. But somewhere in the mix there was curiosity. Curiosity, perhaps, of the unknown…

Which was probably the reason why she didn't shove him off when he brought his head down to hers and kissed her on the lips.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: AH! Sorry about this taking so long. I'm horrible about updating, but I promise I had a really good reason this time! I was in Korea for about a month and I couldn't work no the story and I couldn't update. I'm sosososso sorry!**

**DISCLAIMER: I didn't create Harry Potter because I'm not JK Rowling, I don't have any legal rights to any of the merchandise, yadda yadda yadda. Everyone knows that drill, right? Good. **

He lifted one of his strong, warm hands to gently cup Lily's face. He placed the other on her waist and gently pulled her toward him. She willingly took a step closer to him and wrapped her arms around his neck because he was so strong, so safe…

All of a sudden she felt her back come in contact with the wall of the stairwell. He had somehow managed to switch their positions—not that Lily minded. She was quite content with where she was. As he pinned her body under his, Lily made a small noise at the back of her throat. In response to that, the hand on her back tightened its grip. Lily's own hand became twisted in his messy mop of hair that felt like James' looked like it would feel…

Crap.

Her eyes suddenly snapped open and pushed James away slightly. They were both breathing heavily and with his hot breath on her cheek, she found it very hard to concentrate. But, trying her best, she took a deep breath and found that she couldn't say anything. Their close proximity was getting to her head and the heat radiating from her cheeks seemed to render her completely mute.

So instead of doing the most rational thing—which would have been to explain what had happened was a mistake and gracefully apologize, or maybe just going in for another tongue-tangnling makeout session—she spun on her heel and ran as quick as she could to her dormitory.

The last thing she heard before slamming her dormitory door shut was James swearing rather loudly.

"Oh, bollocks," she muttered under her breath as she frantically paced her room. She tried to get her wits about her, but she really wasn't achieving anything. "Okay. So, let's evaluate what happened, shall we?" she said to herself. "Well, James Potter kissed me. And then I missed him back. And then we snogged and I wanted to tear his clothes off of his body and then, and then… ARRRRGH!" she cried in exasperation. "Bugger, bugger, BUGGER!"

Lily took a deep, calming breath and walked into the adjoining toilet. She splashed come cool water on to her face in hopes that it would calm her down a bit. As she towelled off her face, she glanced into the mirror and noticed that the colour of her cheeks was rather like when a birch tree turned red in the autumn.

That didn't bode well. Birch trees weren't a good omen for her at all.

But then again, being green like a pine tree usually signalled some kind of sickness, and that wasn't too good either.

"I'm going _insane!_" she screamed and buried her face in her hands.

After tearing around her room and pacing the floor for another ten minutes, Lily decided to take a long nap. Hopefully, she thought, it would refresh her mind and answer some of the many questions running through her head. Unfortunately, she didn't make it past crawling into her four-poster bed. McKenna came back from breakfast and entered the dormitory with a worried expression on her face.

"Lily?" she called upon her entry. "Are you okay?"

"Bloody brilliant! Just fan-freaking-tastic. I'm on top of the world here!" cried out Lily with killing sarcasm.

"Er, are you PMSing?"

"You know, normally I'd take offence to that," said Lily sitting up straight.

"Normally you don't swear a lot," McKenna pointed out. "I don't think you're normal right now."

"Excellent point."

McKenna went to her trunk and started to look through its contents and Lily flopped back down onto her bed.

"I'm insane," moaned Lily. "I've gone completely and utterly insane!"

"Tell me something new," muttered McKenna, head still buried in her trunk.

Lily tell her something new, something scandalous along the lines of…

"I snogged Potter."

"_WHAT?_" screeched McKenna, dropping whatever she was holding. She slowly and cautiously made her way over to her best friend. "_WHAT?_"

Lily didn't really want to delve any deeper into the topic. After all, she herself didn't know exactly how it had happened or why it had happened. It was all very new and very confusing for her.

Unsure of what to say, she smoothed her thick, red covers down. What would be the best way to explain it? 'Um, I know you know that everyone knows that I hate James Potter despite the fact that he's not bad looking and he's excellent at Quidditch and all that jazz. Well, anyway. I kissed him. Actually, it's probably more accurate to say that he kissed me and I kissed him back. And then we stood there for a while snogging the brains out of each other.'

Yeah, okay. That would work if she wanted to seem even MORE freakish.

"I don't know what happened," admitted Lily dolefully. "It was like… BAM! We were stuck together at the mouth."

Wide-eyed with confusion and wonder, McKenna asked, "But… Lils. You kissed _James Potter_?"

"You think I know?" replied Lily helplessly. "If I had to guess, I'd say it's because of you."

"Me?" McKenna blinked in surprise. "Why me?"

"You and your stupid bet. It's all your fault! If you hadn't challenged me to snog a stupid boy I wouldn't have been consumed with my overwhelming failure. If I hadn't been consumed by my overwhelming failure, I wouldn't have made out with the first person I could!"

"Don't blame your uncontrollable lust on me, Lily Evans!" countered McKenna.

"Uncontrollable lust? _What _are you talking about?"

McKenna's face showed the beginnings of a smirk. "Remember? The sexual tension Henry Wolsten said you and James had. It must have overtaken your mind and reconnected you with your primitive, animalistic instincts."

"I'm not an animal, though! I'm a pine tree!" Lily exclaimed punching her white down pillow.

Her best friend gave her a look that clearly insinuated that she thought she was very strange.

"I don't think I'm going to ask."

"A very sound decision," Lily said quickly. "If I were you, I wouldn't want to know either."

"Well, if you were me than I'd be you and if I were you I wouldn't be so distraught over kissing James Potter because you fancy him."

"No I don't!" gasped Lily. "I would never fancy him!"

"That's not what you told me yesterday when you were piss drunk."

"I did not!"

"Would I lie to you?" McKenna asked, sounding rather exasperated with Lily.

"Yes," stated Lily, tossing her hair over her shoulder defiantly.

McKenna laughed. "Yeah, I would. But I'm not lying now. You said – and I quote: 'James can be poopy sometimes, but he's pretty great'."

Lily blushed to the very roots of her hair. Could she have said that? Could she have actually said the word 'poopy'? It wasn't even a real word!

"Shut up," she snapped at her friend. "As my best friend, you're not allowed to use anything I say when I'm drunk against me. Got it?"

"I don't see why you're so snappy, Lily. You won the bet and all that jazz, didn't you?"

Lily's face brightened slightly. "I did, didn't I?"

"Yeah, you did," McKenna continued, trying to cheer her friend up.

"I didn't even mean to. It just _happened_!"

"And you did it with only a few days to spare. Now all you have to worry about is talking to him and sorting through it all and whatnot."

Lily couldn't resist rolling her eyes at the comment. "And that's not going to be very awkward at all, right?"

Her friend just laughed in response. Of course she laughed, Lily mused. She didn't know that Lily had something else to worry about. She didn't know that Lily secretly enjoyed the kiss she shared with James and kind of sort of almost wished that it could happen again.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: IT HAD BEEN WAY TOO LONG. I'm so sorry! But I do have a really good excuse this time: I moved away from home and got a new laptop, and all my stories and stuff are saved on this computer and not my new one. I know I have to switch it over soon (and I will do it eventually, I promise!) so you know, I can upload and update with what I already have written. It just sort of slipped my mind, what with all that new university stuff. ( But I'll try to update more often now… **

**Anyway, I hope this chapter is satisfying. Read, enjoy and review, please!**

**DISCLAIMER: I didn't create Harry Potter because I'm not JK Rowling, I don't have any legal rights to any of the merchandise, yadda yadda yadda. Everyone knows that drill, right? Good. **

Lily tried her best to avoid James and their impending confrontation for the next few days. When she knew that he was in Gryffindor Tower, she left it promptly and headed for the library. When she heard that he was wandering the corridors, she immediately made her way to the girls' toilet. When he was outside, she dashed up into her dormitory.

It was actually refreshingly easy, and a lot simpler and less embarrassing for her than actually talking to James. And the fact that she looked away every time he tried to catch her eye was not mean in the slightest, it was just helpful. The way Lily saw it, the less she saw his face, the less she would look at his lips and the less she would remember how nice they felt against her own.

And the less she thought about that, the saner she became.

So really, she was being completely and utterly irrational and mean for her own mental well-being.

Too bad it wasn't working that well. It wasn't that every corner she turned reminded her of James; it was more like her brain kept wandering and wondering, and every time that happened, she would get a funny little feeling in the pit of her stomach. That feeling led to her mentally chastise herself, and so her mind was going around in never ending circles of James-kiss-tummy lurch-scolding. The cycle was so very un-piney.

Lily didn't like being so un-piney. But she had been un-piney since the moment she decided to avoid James Potter.

Maybe it would be easier to forget that they kissed if she hated him for making her un-piney.

Or maybe not.

One evening, she sat around the fire in the common room with McKenna and Emmeline under the guise of doing some homework. But really, they were just lounging around, gossiping and giggling. It felt nice, ignoring the James-kiss-tummy lurch-scolding. It was really refreshing.

But no doubt it would have been a lot more refreshing if Potter hadn't chosen that moment to corner her.

"Evans," James said. He had a nervous glint in his eye that was most uncharacteristic of him. "We need to talk."

Lily nodded and haplessly got out of the plush red armchair she was sitting in. With a word, she followed him out of the common room, perfectly aware that everyone was staring at them, wondering why the two Heads were going for a seemingly random stroll. Could it be that they were finally getting along?

Well, if by 'getting along' they meant 'aching to making out with each other', then yes, yes they were.

The unlikely duo walked down the grey stone corridors of the castle. In silence. They wandered past the library. In more silence. The silence was very distracting. Lily couldn't concentrate on anything but the awkwardness of their situation, what she should say and what he would say. She was so absorbed in her thoughts that she didn't notice that James was talking.

"… don't really know where to go from there, you know?" he was saying. His eyes were firmly locked on the floor and his hands were resolutely stuffed into his pant pockets. He looked so unsure of himself that Lily almost laughed.

But she didn't. Instead she politely cleared her throat and said, "Sorry? I didn't catch that."

James finally faced her, his bespectacled eyes wide with disbelief. "Are you deliberately making this harder for me than it already is, Evans?"

"I just didn't hear what you said the first time," she muttered honestly. "It's not my fault."

He sighed heavily. "So I really have to say all that again?"

She flashed him a half-hearted toothy, cheesy grin, hoping to lighten the mood. James chuckled in spite of himself.

"You're a bit wonky, you know that?" he teased gently.

"Oh, more than you know," she informed him. "You have no idea."

James ran his hand through his hair, effectively making it even more unruly and unkempt and adorable. He heaved another sigh and admitted, "I must be a little wonky, too."

"Why do you say that?"

"Because… hell, Evans. This would be a lot easier if you'd _listened _to what I said before. Isn't that why we're here anyway? To talk?"

"Yeah, to _talk_. We didn't come out here to berate me, now did we?" she snapped.

James rubbed his eyes without taking his glasses off. "Okay, okay. Sorry. I didn't mean to – you know. It's just this is kind of stressful, you know?"

Lily, for once in her life, didn't counter that with a witty comment.

He took a deep breath in and slowly let it out. "Right. Er, this isn't easy. So I'm just going to do it, okay?

"I'm sorry about what happened. Not really. It was really nice. And it'd be nice if it happened again. I mean, I obviously fancy you, right? And even if it's not so obvious recently, it was before, like a long time ago… and I guess it's even more so now because I've just _told_ you how I feel and I sound like a blithering idiot. But yeah… I've liked you for an awful long time, and I suppose you know that too. If you knew that then you must also realize that every other time I kissed a girl or held her hand or hugged her didn't mean half as much to me as you talking to me in a civil tone. And then today… it was just sort of like, 'wow'. I don't want you to think that that was nothing to me, you know? That I just kind of go around and kiss girls like that randomly all the time. I don't. I'm not a jerk like that. At least I _try_ not to be.

"Crap, I've made an even bigger fool of myself now, haven't I? You must think I'm some sort of sappy freak. But I don't care because I've waited long enough to say it and now that it's out there, I feel a lot better about everything.

"I guess… I guess I just want to hear your, er, take of all this. But for Pete's sake, Lily, don't lie. Don't say that when we… _you know_… that you didn't feel anything or that you didn't like it. I can damn well tell that you did. Or, at least I think you did. I'm not really sure anymore. I was really sure when it was in my head and now that I've said it aloud it sounds really stale and stupid."

Then he paused, his eyes imploring. They stood in silence again. This time it wasn't awkward but expectant.

Lily tried to absorb what had happened. James Potter had spilled everything and practically regurgitated the contents of his stomach in the process.

He liked her.

That wasn't a big shocker because… well, she supposed she always kind of sort of suspected that.

What _was_ shocking was the fact that he said, "And it'd be nice if it happened again".

Did he _expect_ something to come from their lust-driven snog session?

Did she want something to come from their lust-driven snog session?

She cleared her throat to buy her some time. And still he gazed at her.

"Do you _expect_ something to come from our lust-driven snog session, Potter?" She cringed. Why did she always have to blurt out the first thing that came to mind? It was such an un-piney thing to do.

It, however, didn't seem to faze James. It almost seemed like he was expecting her to ask that question.

"I don't know," he answered, finally tearing his eyes away from hers. "Do you?"

"Well," she cautioned, toying with a lock of auburn hair. His head instantly turned to her. "This is really weird. I mean, I went from hating your guts to osculating you in one day. It's a very strange idea for my head to wrap itself around."

James nodded his head and remained silent in anticipation of her answer.

"To jump from where we started off this morning into _something_ would be too much of a shock, don't you think? Well, I think so. But maybe, _maybe, _if we gave it a little time it'd progress more naturally," she suggested. "I think we should just take it slowly. _Very_ slowly."

"We'll take teeny tiny baby steps," said James, the corners of his mouth curving into a small smile.

"Baby steps," echoed Lily, liking the sound of it already.

Suddenly much more chipper, James pushed his glasses up his nose and stood up straighter. "Good. I'm glad we had this talk."

"Likewise."

"So I'll be off now. I'll talk to you later?"

"Later," confirmed Lily. He nodded his head and began to walk off when "Goodbye, James" came flying out of her mouth.

He spun on his heel and gaped at her in confusion. "I beg your pardon? I mean… you've never called me that before. Ever. Really. I don't think you've _ever_ called me James. I've always been Potter. Or, you know, 'Arse' or 'Git' or 'You insufferable prat'."

Lily grinned playfully at him. "Baby steps, remember?"

"Right. Baby steps."

And then he was gone. Lily was left to her own devices. She couldn't help but smile at his awkwardness. It was almost endearing. And she couldn't help but marvel at the way _James_ just seemed to flow off of her tongue so naturally. Perhaps taking baby steps would be a hell of a lot easier than she imagined.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Well, I got this chapter up quicker than I expected. It was pretty easy to write, but nothing much happens… or so you think! Wait until later chapters, dear readers! Muahahaha. **

**By the way, that's pretty much an empty promise. There's not a lot from this chapter that'll transfer to later chapters. Blah blah blah. I'm sleepy.**

**Anyway! You guys should TOTALLY check out my other story, _The Hogwarts Hearsay_. It's just a fun little idea I had in my head and I really like the concept. So you should read and review that, and read and review this! (Like how I snuck that in there?)**

**DISCLAIMER: I didn't create Harry Potter because I'm not JK Rowling, I don't have any legal rights to any of the merchandise, yadda yadda yadda. Everyone knows that drill, right? Good. **

It was a beautiful day. The breeze was crisp and cool and the leaves were a mix of fiery red, gold and orange. The sky was a blue reminiscent of the bottom third of a rocket popsicle and the sun was a golden yellow. It was the perfect, clichéd autumn day and the Gryffindor quidditch team was flying high in the air furiously smacking, throwing and chasing balls. Lily Evans, on the other hand, was being dragged across the grass toward the quidditch pitch against her will.

"McKenna! Let me go now!" she protested as she tried to get her arm free from her friend's grasp.

"Why don't you want to go see James practice for the big match? I bet it'll be sexy. And besides, you guys are friends now. You can watch him practice and it won't even be awkward," McKenna said with a cunning smile on her face. Behind her, Lily stopped dead in her tracks with her mouth agape.

"Not awkward?" she echoed. McKenna attempted to start moving again but Lily remained firmly rooted to her spot. "How won't that be awkward?"

"I think it has something to do with your being friends with him," she replied and tugged at her arm again.

Lily rolled her eyes and said, "We're not friends yet. We're friendly."

"Same difference."

"They're two totally different things!" cried Lily, straining to get away. "And besides, 'same difference'? That doesn't even make sense!"

"I don't know what you're talking about. You're loony," scoffed McKenna. Ignoring her friend's cries and pleas, she marched off toward the quidditch pitch.

"I can't believe you're making me do this," fumed Lily as she reluctantly followed her friend to the looming pitch. "This is absolutely ridiculous. I hate you, did you know that? I really hate you. I think you should go drag your stupid little boyfriend off to some random place instead of me. Actually, I don't think you should do that unless you're using protection. I hope you are, McKenna, even though I hate you. I really do. You better let me go or else I'll… I'll… I'll give you a detention! Why aren't you letting me go? Honestly, sometimes I think you're really psychotic. How can you make me do this? Don't you feel any sort of embarrassment – oh," she trailed off as she walked into something that felt like a person.

"Um, hi," that something that felt like a person said.

Lily felt her cheeks redden. She felt her ears redden. She was so embarrassed she even felt the tips of her fingertips redden. She looked up slowly and mentally cursed her luck because the thing she walked into was none other than her ex-boyfriend, Thomas.

"Hello," Lily said, quickly backing away from his taut, quidditch-toned form. She noted that McKenna still hadn't let go of her arm and was beginning to tug at it.

"Why're you here? I didn't know you liked quidditch," said Thomas. He ran a hand through his wavy, thick locks and just looking at his hair made Lily go weak at the knees.

"I – I don't," she stammered.

"She's here to see James," interrupted McKenna. She stood off to the side, looking rather impatient. Her grip hadn't loosened on Lily's arm and it was becoming rather painful.

"James?" Thomas' eyebrows shot to his hairline and Lily cringed inwardly at his look of surprise.

"Not really," she giggled nervously. "Er, McKenna dragged me here."

"To see James," stated McKenna. "Didn't you hear, Tommy-boy? They're friends now."

"Friends?" Thomas raised his eyebrows even higher.

"We're, ah, friendly," said Lily, squirming under his scrutinizing gaze. She wasn't being very pine-y. Her confidence was withering away and she was just a pile of mush.

"You're friendly?"

"Ah… I guess…"

"So, Thomas," said McKenna, effectively inching her way into the awkward conversation, "how's the girlfriend?"

The girlfriend. Thomas' girlfriend. The girl he was fooling around with when she so happened to stumble upon them. That wretch with the mismatched buttons and the crazy sex hair.

That was so not cool.

Lily tossed her hair over her shoulder and stood up straighter. She looked Thomas square in the eye and said, "I don't know why you care so much, McKenna. It really doesn't matter to us, does it?" With that, she walked away, dragging McKenna behind her and leaving Thomas alone with his raised eyebrows.

"What are you doing?" questioned McKenna as she ran to keep up with her friend.

"I," began Lily, "am being assertive. I'm becoming more pine-like. I don't want to be near him."

"Well said!" cheered McKenna.

She stomped around aimlessly, her mind working over-time. How dare Thomas creep up on her and pretend like they were friends? How dare her express interest in her well-being? It was annoying how close he came to making her forget his meanness and dumbness and only remember his Thomas-ness. He was annoying.

But at the same time, Lily had to admit that he smelled good. Kind of like… good memories. And cookies. Nice, warm, freshly baked cookies that were still kind of gooey with melted chocolate…

Lily loved cookies. She could have gone for a cookie right then. She probably would have turned back to the castle and headed straight to the kitchen if James Potter hadn't materialized before her with his posse.

"Heeeeeey, Evans!" Sirius called out with his hands cupped to his mouth. "Where are you going?"

Lily stopped and stared at him, unblinking. It was as if she couldn't quite process where she was and how she got there when all she really wanted was a damn cookie.

"What are you doing? Go and say hi," whispered McKenna. She tactfully nudged her forward by freeing her arm and jabbing her elbow into her back.

"Hi, Sirius, Peter," she said, nodding at each boy. She took a deep breath before saying, "Hi, James," and merely glancing at Remus because she was still mortified at the fact that he rejected her.

And then there was silence. It was sort of as if the bees stopped buzzing around and the trees stopped rustling and people stopped moving just because Lily had said the word _James_.

"Hey," he said easily. He seemed to be pretending to not notice that his friends were staring at him with their mouths wide open. Lily could even see Sirius' uvula – a sight she could stand not seeing for the rest of her life.

"Um, how was quidditch practice?" she ventured, still aware of the fact that the world was eerily quiet.

"Not bad," he said and hoisted his broomstick over his left shoulder.

"So you're ready for your big match?" she said, finally meeting his eye. She was pleasantly surprised to find that they were full of warmth and… was that amusement? Was he amused at her awkwardness, or did he relate to it? She would have to ask him later. After all, they were becoming friends.

"Eh, I guess. We could use some fine tuning, but I'm not complaining. I'm pretty sure we've got the best bloody team in the school."

"Right. So then when you lose I'm going to remind you that you said that and make you eat your words," she teased.

"You're rooting for us to lose?" he gasped with mock surprise. "Where is your house spirit?"

"I have plenty of house spirit and I've plenty of faith in Gryffindor. I'm just not sure I have all that much faith in you," she smirked. She couldn't believe it. She was participating in witty repartee, with James Potter no less. She felt comfortable teasing him. Maybe, she mused, they could forgo the whole snogging thing and become witty-bantering buddies.

Except for the fact that she couldn't get their electrifying and life-changing kiss out of her head.

That and the fact that when he reached out to playfully push her shoulder her skin burned with his touch even though she was wearing a cloak and her robes.

It wasn't possible to be friends with something who could send shivers down your spine with the lightest brush of their fingertips. Well, it wasn't possible to do that and still be sane.

"Pushing people around is a little juvenile, James," she informed him. "Although I think I should be glad you didn't hex me something horrible."

He grinned. "Yeah, you probably should be. I've got loads of charms and hexes and spells I could've used…"

"And then I would've given you detention."

"You can't give the Head Boy a detention. That's against the laws of life! Only the Head Boy is allowed to give detentions."

"So is the Head Girl," she shot back.

"Not to the Head Boy!"

"Yes, she is."

"None of the Heads can get detentions because they own detention giving rights."

"No, they don't."

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure they do."

"They don't! But let's just be glad you didn't use any of your spells, so we don't really have to find out," she said, negotiating peace.

She felt some of the bees fall down out of their hives and the trees drop some of their leaves. She was also pretty sure that somewhere, a person fainted in shock because she, Lily Evans, had just _avoided_ an argument with James Potter. It was a monumental event. Sirius and Peter seemed to think so because they both made a strange gargling noise. Lily glanced at them and seemed to suddenly remember that she and James were not the only ones outside.

Lily grabbed McKenna's arm again, suddenly feeling extremely awkward. "Well, we were taking a walk. We should, er, finish it before… later. So, I'll see you around."

"Okay. Bye," said James. His friends were still too gobsmacked to say anything, and Lily rushed off before they had a chance to recover. But as she walked away, she heard James' friends ask things like, "Did she just call you James?", "You two talked with killing anything or exploding anything. Pinch me, because I think I'm dreaming," and "What in Merlin's name just _happened_ here?"

McKenna grinned at Lily. "That wasn't so hard, was it?"

"Not really."

"It wasn't awkward, was it?"

"Are you kidding me?" exclaimed Lily. "That was probably one of the most embarrassing things I've ever lived through."

"Well, it sure didn't seem like it."

"That's because I'm a good liar."

"Not really."

"I'm an excellent conversationalist."

"Nope. Why won't you tell me the truth?" McKenna asked in a sing-song voice. Lily arched her eyebrows. What did McKenna want to hear?

"I don't know what truth you want me to tell."

"Oh, I think you do. It has something to do with you and James and love."

Lily blanched. "Love? I don't think so. But… I guess I kind of like talking to him."

"That's what I want to hear!"

"It's a lot of fun making fun of him; it's way more fun than I thought!"

---

News that Lily and James were actually civil to each other spread like wildfire. But somehow, the actual events that took place got distorted. The rumours began to become crazy. So crazy that it lead to Lily's dorm-mate Heather marching up to her bedside and demanding to know if she was pregnant with James' baby.

"What?" shrilled Lily. "What?"

Heather shrugged. "That's what I heard. People are saying that you're only being really nice to James and vice versa is because you want your child to have parents that can stand each other."

"That's ridiculous!" cried Lily. "I've never even had sex before, much less with James Potter!"

"Really?" asked one of Lily's roommates. "You're a virgin?"

"THAT IS SO BESIDE THE POINT," she yelled. "THE POINT IS THAT JAMES POTTER AND I DO NOT HAVE A LOVE CHILD. We're _friends_. What's wrong with us being friends? Why do people find it so weird? Am I not allowed to have friends?"

"Not friends named James Potter," said Emmeline.

"Why?" she fumed. She flopped back against her pillows and stared up at her ceiling. "My life sucks. People think I'm preggers."

"Who cares?" McKenna called out lazily from her bed. "All that matters is what you think and know and stuff like that. Let people think what they think… most of the people talking smack about you are people who wish they were friends with Potter anyhow."

"So you guys are actually friends?" Heather asked, perching herself on the edge of Lily's bed.

"Yeah," replied Lily, still burning holes in the ceiling with her eyes.

"Really? Just friends? Nothing more? I'm only saying this because you two seem to have a lot of passion. And sexual tension."

"Again with the sexual tension?" said a frustrated Lily. "What is with people and thinking that our loins are burning for each other?"

"Maybe you just need to get laid, Lily," snickered Emmeline.

"Oh, sod off," replied Lily, throwing a sock in her friend's direction. "This is serious. James and I have a baby and burning loins. I've never had burning loins before!"

Except, Lily reminded herself, that wasn't exactly true. She thought that maybe her loins burned when James kissed her before. She knew that they were supposed to be taking things slow and that they were only friendly and not friends, but she didn't think she minded when he touched her like that.

"This is awful," declared Lily. "I'm going to bed."

She shoved an unsatisfied Heather off of her bed and shut the drapes. In the darkness, she groaned into her pillow. First she hated James, then she was friends with James and supposedly having his baby. Plus, more than one person thought that they had this odd sexual tension between them. What was worse was that Lily was starting to believe it herself.

Her life was so very over.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Ta-da! I present to you chapter 11! It's a little choppy and kind of dialogue-y, but I think it turned out okay. Tell me what you think!**

**DISCLAIMER: I didn't create Harry Potter because I'm not JK Rowling, I don't have any legal rights to any of the merchandise, yadda yadda yadda. Everyone knows that drill, right? Good. **

Lily was having a distinctly un-piney day. There was just no way around it. She woke up late and didn't get to eat breakfast, she broke a nail in Care of Magical Creatures, she accidentally set her hair on fire in Charms and now she couldn't even get a simple spell to work for her.

"_Converte adama,_" she said, pointing her wand at a lump of coal.

Nothing happened. What was happening to her? She was a smart witch, a talented witch. She should be able to configure a stupid dumb lump of coal.

"_Converte amada,_" she repeated. To her surprise, her coal shook a bit and lifted about thee inches into the air. She waited with baited breath as the coal began spinning quickly…

… before landing back on the table, looking exactly the same as it did before.

Frustrated, Lily let out a breath and forced herself to remain calm. McGonagall certainly wouldn't be too impressed if the Head Girl screamed and broke the table by pounding on it with a poor, defenseless lump of coal.

And besides, losing her cool like that wouldn't constitute as piney, and Lily needed all the piney-ness she could get at that point.

To her right, McKenna snorted.

"What's so funny?" Lily demanded, turning to face her.

"Nothing… it's just that you suck at this," McKenna said, trying to stifle her laughter.

"I do not," protested Lily, her cheeks turning red.

"You kind of do."

"I'm having a bit of difficulty with this spell," admitted Lily, "but that doesn't mean I _suck_. That's a powerful word. To suck is to…"

"Try about twenty-five times and not yield any results whatsoever. Come on, Lils. Even I've gotten the coal to do _something_."

"You haven't managed to do the spell properly, either, though," Lily pointed out.

"So? At least mine changed colours. So technically, my coal isn't just coal anymore. It's _white_ coal, and that's a lot closer to the final result than having just a plain lump of black coal."

Lily stared at her friend, her mouth agape. "You're enjoying this!"

McKenna attempted to give her an innocent look but couldn't quite pull it off. "Enjoying what?" she asked evasively.

"You're enjoying my… my… suckiness!" she accused.

McKenna's reply was rolling her eyes and a, "Well, _duh._ I mean, come on. How many times in life do I get to be better at spells than you?"

"Loads!"

"Never," interjected Emmeline, who was seated on Lily's left. Lily glanced at Emmeline's coal: it, too, was white.

_Damn._

"Lily, you're, like, one of the smartest person I know. It's not that often that we can best you at something. It's pretty much a rare occurrence. We're just relishing the moment before it ends."

"You would be able to beat me more often if you studied me! And besides, you haven't _bested_ me," refuted Lily. "You haven't managed to change your completely, either!"

"But white coal trumps black coal," stated McKenna.

"It's all still _coal_!" exclaimed Lily.

"Evans! Vance! Simmons!" barked McGonagall. The three girls' heads snapped forward. "I see no reason why you three should be talking as none of you have managed to successfully transfigure anything this class."

Lily felt her ears burn.

"But Professor," McKenna said. "Wouldn't you say that managing to turn the coal white is better than having just plain black coal?"

McGonagall arched an eyebrow before slowly saying, "It is progress."

Both McKenna and Emmeline turned to Lily with smug looks on their faces.

"Oh, sod off," Lily huffed. She looked back down at the table and focused on her coal. She tried to visualize it turning clear. Still concentrating, she slowly lifted her wand and opened her mouth. "_Converte adama_."

Still nothing.

Her friends giggled at her misfortune, which ticked Lily off. She couldn't help it if she was just so naturally talented she normally outshone them. It wasn't her fault! And when she managed to get the hang of a spell before her friends, she certainly didn't gloat about it as they were gloating.

"_Converte adama,_" she tried again.

If coal could make noise, Lily was sure that it would be laughing at her, just like her so-called friends.

"Two more minutes," called out McGonagall. "Then you are to turn your coal in to me for grading."

The class groaned.

"Well, Lils," said McKenna, "it looks like you're doomed to fail this grading."

"Would you please shut up?" Lily hissed fiercely. There was so much venom in her voice McKenna actually looked taken aback.

"What – ?" began McKenna. But before she could finish, Lily blurted out, "No one really wants to be reminded that they suck. No none needs to be told repeatedly that they can't do something correctly."

"Lily, I'm –"

"_Converte adama,_" tried Lily again, ignoring her friend, not really expecting anything to happen and not really putting any effort into it. To her surprise, her piece of coal began to shake and it was engulfed in light. After a moment it stopped moving and the light faded, leaving it its place a perfect, sparkling diamond.

"Whoa," gasped Emmeline, who was still working with her white coal.

"You did it," stated McKenna.

Lily blinked. She stared at her diamond, hardly believing that she managed to make the spell work. Then she felt someone's gaze on her. She turned around in her seat and found James Potter looking at her. His wand was raised, pointed directly to her diamond. When he caught her eye, he hastily put his wand down and gave her a sheepish smile.

"Time's up," announced McGonagall as a few students hurriedly attempted the spell a few more desperate times. "Please hand your diamonds in _now_."

The students got up and formed a single file line at the teacher's desk. Lily lingered back a bit, staring at her diamond. Well, really, it was James' diamond. But he changed it for her. Lily didn't know quite how to feel about that; she was certainly relieved and grateful, but she also felt a twinge of indignation. Did he think that she couldn't change coal into diamonds without his help?

Of course, she _couldn't_ do it all by herself. At least, not yet.

She fell into line behind James.

"You didn't have to do that, you know," she told him in a low voice.

James turned around to look at her. "I know."

"Then why did you do it? Not that I'm not grateful or anything, but I feel kind of awkward handing your diamond in," admitted Lily.

"You do?" he asked, his eyebrows rising in surprise. "You've never passed someone else's work off as your own?"

"Of course not!" she said as they shuffled forward. "That's… sort of unethical, don't you think?"

"Maybe," she shrugged. "Well, okay, yeah, it is. But if it's only a bit of someone's essay on the morning it's due, it can be one hell of a lifesaver."

"But handing in a diamond in a class where most people are handing in white coal…"

"Hey, you would be handing in black coal if it weren't for me."

"Thanks," she said sarcastically, rolling her eyes.

"Anytime," he smiled. "You were looking pretty stressed out. Just thought I could help out a bit."

Lily blinked. "That's… that's nice of you."

"Anytime," he said again before turning to McGonagall and proffering his diamond to her. "Here you go, Professor. It's a nice one, innit?"

McGonagall didn't reply. She examined the gem before giving him a tight-lipped smile and a, "Nice job, Potter."

James gave her a quick grin before taking his diamond back and sauntering off with his friends. Lily couldn't help but roll her eyes at his care-free attitude before going up to the teacher's desk herself.

"Very nice," McGonagall said before jotting down a mark on her parchment and handing the diamond back to Lily.

Once out of the classroom, Lily ran to catch up with James.

"Here," she said, slightly out of breath. "This is yours," she told him, holding out the glittery stone.

He looked at her strangely. "No," he said slowly. "It's yours .I made it for you. Keep it, or chuck it or something."

"Oh," said Lily in surprise. "Okay."

"See you," he said, before walking away again.

"Yeah, bye," she muttered. She looked down to her open palm. It was beautiful, really.

Lily didn't feel indignant anymore. She didn't really feel grateful or relieved anymore. She just felt like smiling.

---

"He did that?" breathed Emmeline as the two walked to dinner later that night. "James is _romantic_."

Lily blinked in surprise. "No he's not."

Emmeline faced her friend, a slightly incredulous look on her face. "Of _course_ he is! He saved your sorry butt from failing that thingie in Transfiguration today. And he gave you a diamond! That's romantic. He loves you."

Lily felt her cheeks redden. He didn't _love_ her. He might have been wildly attracted to her and her fabulous snogging skills, but that wasn't love. She didn't want it to be love. She was only seventeen, for heaven's sake! She was too young to be in love.

But, she had to grudgingly admit that the notion of James being romantic towards her made her shivery and made her feel like she had swallowed a mouthful of chocolate.

"Don't be ridiculous," she scoffed. "He doesn't love me."

"But he may like you."

"I think that's a possibility."

"And you may like him."

Lily flushed a deeper red than she thought was possible. "I – I don't know."

Emmeline almost squealed in delight. "WOW! Who would have ever thought that this was possible?"

Lily shushed her friend as they approached the Great Hall. She wasn't sure about her feelings concerning James. She knew that he made her smile, but she didn't need anyone else knowing about it. Most of the school was just getting over her burning loins and their illegitimate love child. She didn't want to add fuel to the fire. It didn't need anymore fuel.

As they entered the cavernous room, Lily glanced around to the Hufflepuff table and saw McKenna there fawning over her boyfriend. She caught her eye and waved. In return, McKenna jerked her head over to the Ravenclaw table with an eyebrow arched. Confused, Lily looked in that direction and saw Thomas blatantly staring at her.

Well, that was strange.

"Evans!" someone shouted at her from the Gryffindor table.

She turned and saw James waving at her. She smiled and approached him with Emmeline trailing behind her.

"Remus and I are having a debate that we need you to settle," he told her as she sat down.

"Ah, okay," she said. She shot a look at Remus who was pointedly staring anywhere but at her. She cringed as she remembered how he scampered away after she kissed him. Sometimes she felt like such an idiot.

"We're trying to settle what's better: chess or Exploding Snap."

"_That's_ why you needed my help?" Lily asked.

James grinned at her. "Okay, you got me. I just sort of wanted you to talk to me."

Lily smacked him on the head. "Does that ever work without you getting hexed, cursed or spat on?"

"I don't know," replied James seriously. "This is the first time I've tried it, so you tell me."

"I think it sucks," she said, smacking on the head again. "But I think I'll stay anyway."

He laughed and winked at her. And for perhaps the very first time, Lily looked him square in the eye and really smiled back. A real nothing-held-back, genuine, unguarded smile.

She felt a flicker of something deep in the pit of her stomach. She couldn't quite place it and wasn't sure if she wanted to. She didn't want to mar it by trying to describe it with words. It just… was. And she was happy with that.

For the first time since Thomas broke up with her, she was happy and wasn't thinking about him. In fact, he wasn't even in the deepest, most removed corners of her mind.

Which was probably why she was so surprised when he cornered her as she was patrolling the corridors later that night.

"Er, hi," she said awkwardly.

"Hey," he said, looking nervous.

"Um, you should go to your common room now," she informed him, eager to avoid small talk.

He didn't move. He stood in front of her, biting his bottom lip.

"Is there, er, something you want to say?"

Thomas took a deep breath but didn't say anything. It sort of looked like he was constipated. Lily began to feel slightly concerned for him. She knew what it was like to be constipated. It wasn't the most comfortable thing to be. She was contemplating how to tell him to take a Muggle laxative when…

"Lily, I want you back."


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: DUN DUN DUN! I'm back with a new chapter! This is the chapter, folks! This is the scenario I had in my head and then I fleshed a story around it. I hope it turned out okay. I hope it's at least enjoyable and leaves you begging for more! Haha, no, I'm not that much of a sadist. But I do hope you guys like it, especially everyone who was nice enough to review last time. **

**AND ON TO THANKING THE REVIEWERS. Oh my GOSH, guys! You totally made my year! I really wasn't expecting to get as many reviews as I did, and I'm sosososososo thankful to each and everyone of you. Lots of love and lots of heart and lots of cookies go to you!**

**_Super Cara_, thanks for telling me about my spelling mistake. The spell is supposed to be _converte adama_, because "adama" is (if I used the translation) Latin for diamond. But my Latin is pretty bad, and I may be wrong. Anyway! I'm going to change it just as soon as I get off my lazy butt. Thanks again!**

**And just one final note, it's probably going to be a really long time before my next update because it's exam time! Whoohoo, I'm _so_ excited rolls eyes. And then after that, it's Christmas time and there's working and shopping and family-ing, but I'll try to get the next one up around… the first week of January?**

**DISCLAIMER: I didn't create Harry Potter because I'm not JK Rowling, I don't have any legal rights to any of the merchandise, yadda yadda yadda. Everyone knows that drill, right? Good.**

Lily was stunned. Did Thomas actually just say what she thought he said? He couldn't have… after all, he was the one who broke up with _her_ and he was the one who was sexing that Allison character. Probably, Lily mused, she was just delusional because of lack of sleep or something. Or maybe talking and being nice to James had some sort of weird negative side affect.

"Uh, sorry?" she said as pleasantly as she possibly could, trying to mask her craziness.

"I want to get back together," Thomas said unabashedly.

At least she _wasn't_ delusional.

"What?" gasped Lily.

Thomas looked at her intently. "I made a mistake. I shouldn't have dumped you." He paused, taking in a deep breath. "Can you forgive me?"

Lily couldn't speak. She couldn't move, she couldn't breathe. How could this be happening? She had just gotten over Thomas after she and James… well, after their little excursion. But now old feelings were resurfacing and try as she might, she couldn't get rid of the gnawing feeling in the pit of her stomach that was telling her to go for it. To forgive Thomas, to go back to the way things were when they were the "Power Couple" of Hogwarts.

But… now there was _James_

When Lily didn't speak, he gazed at her imploringly and softly said, "Lils?"

Taking a deep breath, she managed to squeeze the words, "What about Allison?" out of her mouth.

Thomas looked away from her face and shoved his hands into his pockets. Lily held her breath, not sure of what to expect, not sure of what she wanted to hear. Her heart was pounding and her ears were filled with a dull roar.

"Allison… she wasn't you, Lily. She just wasn't you."

The roar in her ears intensified. Her knees felt weak and she had no idea what to say. How was she supposed to react to this? It was so unexpected. It was something so unwanted; yet it was something she craved. Her body tingled at the memory of him holding her and all of a sudden, all she could think of was how nice it would be to feel his strong arms around her in another embrace; to hear her name whispered from his lips.

"I—" she started before remembering how nice it felt when James held her, too. She could almost feel his hot breath on her ear as he whispered comforting words in her ear. She could feel her lips burning as she remembered the kiss they shared…

"Lily," Thomas pleaded. "Answer me."

James, she was sure, probably wouldn't up and leave her so abruptly like Thomas did.

"How am I supposed to forget the way you just left me?" she asked, some indignation rising from the pit of her stomach. "How could you expect that I wouldn't move on?"

"Have you?" he challenged. "Did you already forget about me?"

"Y-yes," she said uncertainly as he moved closer. He moved with certainty, as if he were sure of what he wanted and he knew how to go about getting it. "W-what are you d-doing?"

He had enveloped her in his arms and put his mouth close to her ear. She shivered inadvertently, but it wasn't an altogether bad shiver. "I'm not ready to give up so easily," he whispered huskily.

Lily's emerald eyes opened wide as he kissed her cheek and slowly moved toward her lips. She didn't resist, instead, she closed her eyes, succumbed to his touch and started to remember what things used to be like. It was nice, reminiscing with his mouth attached to hers. But nice, she realized, wasn't as passion-filled and fire-work sparking as her one kiss with James was.

_Clang_.

Shocked, the two former lovebirds broke apart and saw McKenna standing there, her dropped scales on the floor, mouth opened wide and disbelief etched all over her face.

"What the bloody hell are you _doing_, Lily?" she asked in a deadly voice.

The redhead knew what her best friend thought, but she also knew that the truth was far different from it.

"I – its after hours. You should go up to the common room," Lily said, not looking her in the eye.

"What happened to James, Lily?" she asked her voice still low and even, refusing to budge. "After what you told me, I thought that you liked –"

Thomas interrupted. "James? As in James Potter? What happened with him?" he demanded, his voice rising with a suspicious and accusatory tone. "I thought you two were just friendly or some such bollocks."

"It's none of your business!" said a voice from down the corridor.

Lily looked around her. It was a scene out of her worst nightmare. James was standing there, and Sirius, Peter and Remus were right behind him. It looked like they were just passing when they heard all the commotion. It was just her luck. Her ex-boyfriend, the boy she tried to go out with and the boy she used to hate but had kissed were all standing together, staring at her. She could feel that there was going to be a horrible brawl soon. And what was even better was that they had an audience to witness the complete and utter humiliation of Lily Evans.

How very crappy.

"Damn straight it's not!" cried McKenna.

James turned on her. "It's not yours either, Simmons. What do you know? _How_ do you know?"

_No_, screamed Lily in her mind. She knew what was going to happen, she wanted to prevent it with all her heart, but she could not get her body to obey her. Her lungs seemed to be devoid of any air, so she could not utter a single word. But still her mind kept screaming _no, no, no, no! _

"What do you mean? Lily tells me everything. Besides, she had to tell me what you two did, because it won her the bet."

Lily nervously bit her bottom lip as silence befell the group. McKenna clapped her hands over her mouth. Sirius, Remus and Peter all looked at Lily with confusion and disgust. And James turned around ever so slowly and locked eyes with Lily. She felt her stomach drop and a lump form in her throat. She could see the confusion and hurt in his hazel eyes and she felt as if she would do anything to remove it. It was her fault he felt that way. It was her fault…

"What bet?" he asked in a low voice. His eyes never left Lily's face and it was horrible. His eyes were so clear, his emotions showing themselves freely. He never looked more vulnerable before.

The silence stretched on for a bit longer, getting more and more uncomfortable with each passing second. All the while, James never broke eye contact. He was staring at Lily, searching desperately for the answer that he wanted but surely wouldn't find. After a few moments, he repeated his question.

Timidly, McKenna removed her hands from her face and started to explain. "Lily and I had a bet that she… she wouldn't be able to, er, to snog someone in a month's time."

"Is that why you kissed me?" he asked quietly, dangerously.

Lily flinched at how disappointed he sounded. It was even worse because she could _see_ his disappointment and how hurt he was; his expression was that open. She tried to look down, to look away but she could not. It was as if magic was keeping their eyes locked. "N-no," she said finally. Her voice was small and timid. "That's… that's why I k-kissed Remus," she whispered. But the hallway was so silent, everyone heard her.

Remus gaped. Was he surprised that she had mentioned it, or was he simply surprised because he had been used?

_Why_ had Lily been so stupid? She could have walked away from McKenna's ridiculous bet – she _should_ have done that! She should have realized how stupid it was to get herself involved emotionally and to drag other people into her psycho-drama of a life.

"_What?_" hissed James. He looked as if someone had just socked him in the stomach.

"But it didn't count," said McKenna. "It wasn't a snog. It was just a peck. So I told her it didn't count…"

"Is that supposed to make me feel better?" he demanded.

"I told her no, Prongs," Remus interjected. "I said that I didn't feel the same way!"

"And so she went after me?" he asked harshly, looking at Lily but directing his question to McKenna. "I was just another pawn in her sick game?"

"I—I don't think it was like that," stammered McKenna.

Lily tore her eyes away. She couldn't stand to look at him anymore. It was too much for her to bear. Perhaps if she didn't look at him, he would just go away. Perhaps they would all just go away and leave her alone.

But James had other ideas. He walked right up to her and forced her to look at him. "What, was time running out, Lily? Were you afraid that you wouldn't succeed? That's why you came after me, isn't it? I mean it would have been easy. _You knew_ how I felt about you, after all. That's why you kept on making little digs at me whenever you could. You _knew_ that… that I wanted you. Bloody hell, Lily! You _knew_, and then you worked me, didn't you. You _used_ me, _manipulated_ me…"

"SHUT UP!" cried Lily. She didn't know how much more of this torture she could take. "Just shut up!"

"And not only that, you used one of my closest mates!" he roared, acting like he hadn't heard her. "And then you go and fool me, try to hurt me in the worst way possible. Getting back together with _him—_" he said gesturing to Thomas, who was standing there rather awkwardly. "You—you don't… you _disgust_ me," he spat out. "I don't know what I ever saw in you. It's obvious that you're not the person you pretend to be."

"Shut up, shut up," Lily muttered, desperate to just leave. But some unseen force kept her talking, told her that she needed to try and explain herself, maybe not justify her action, but to try and get James to understand. "I didn't… I'm not like that!" She looked at him. "You know I'm not like that! I didn't use you, James…"

"Save it," he said curtly. "I don't want to hear anymore of your crap, Lily. I don't… I don't _care_ anymore."

And with that, he turned on his heel and walked away briskly.

"Wait, stop!" yelled Lily. She began to follow him because she _needed_ him to understand her. She wasn't a horrible person. He had to know that. She didn't care how desperate she must have looked to Sirius, Peter and Remus. They probably thought she was lower than scum for what she did to their friend. She didn't care that they probably thought that she was pathetic and that James was better off without her. To Lily, all that mattered was that James was walking away, that his anger was directed at her and that he wasn't responding.

"James, wait!"

But he kept on walking. He didn't spare her another look.


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: I KNOW! THIS IS LATE! I never should have promised that it would be up by the second week of January at the latest. I definitely should have said August or something, so that if I posted it before, it would have been a very pleasant surprise. Or maybe, I shouldn't have said anything at all. OKAY. That's it. From now on, I'm not saying anything about when I'm going to post next. We all know it'll be a lie anyway. But I really do feel bad. Like, SUPER-BAD because you guys have been so incredibly nice to me. I love all of my readers. Even the ones that don't review (nudge, nudge). Ha, ha. I'm just joking. Not about the love, but about the nudge.**

**So now I get to thank the reviewers, because you guys totally rock. This chapter is dedicated to all of you. I hope you enjoy it and don't kill me because it's bad and boring and whatnot. **

**And Happy Early Valentine's Day!**

**DISCLAIMER: I didn't create Harry Potter because I'm not JK Rowling, I don't have any legal rights to any of the merchandise, yadda yadda yadda. Everyone knows that drill, right? Good.**

_Dear James,_

_I don't know if you're going to ever read this. I bet you'll throw this out as soon as you see that it's from me. It's Lily, by the way, and I really hope that you _don't_ throw this out…_

Lily let out a frustrated sigh and picked up the piece of parchment she was writing on and set it on fire with her wand. As she watched the paper turn to ash, she felt like screaming obscene things and pulling her hair out.

"Lily?" someone behind her inquired softly.

The redhead clenched her jaw and refused to turn around and look at her former best friend.

No, she decided. She didn't want to pull her _own_ hair out, she'd much rather tear McKenna's hair out of her head, one by one. Or… since McKenna _did_ have a lot of hair, pulling it out strand by strand would take too long. So Lily decided that if she ever got the chance, she'd just grab a fistful.

"Lily, I'm sorry," said McKenna. And she did sound sorry. She sounded kind of meek and pathetic. But not so pathetic that it made Lily forget about her obnoxiously large mouth.

So Lily still didn't turn. She felt McKenna's eyes on her – they were like lasers; she could feel her gaze. It was kind of eerie.

"I know I shouldn't have blurted everything out like that –"

Finally, Lily responded. She whipped her head around and icily said, "That's right, you shouldn't have. But because you did, I have absolutely nothing to say to you except this: I would love to pull your hair out right now."

McKenna blinked. She stood there for a moment, seemingly unsure of what her next move should be. Fleetingly, Lily wondered if she would let Lily execute her torturous plan. Instead, McKenna murmured another apology and slid out of their dormitory.

Lily turned back to the pile of ashes sitting in front of her and swallowed the tiny pang of guilt that had surfaced when McKenna left the room.

"Don't feel guilty over _that_," she reprimanded herself. "Feel guilty over what happened with _James_."

But she really didn't need to tell herself that. She felt guilty all the time. Even when she thought she might be feeling a little less guilty, she'd feel even worse than before. Three days had passed since everything had exploded. Three days of attempted apologies on her part, and three days of pushing past her in corridors and ignoring her in meetings and in classes on his part. In those three days, Lily felt as though she was going insane. She desperately wanted him to know that she was a good person, that it was a stupid mistake to make the bet. She wanted him to know that she liked him, really, truly and honestly. But he wouldn't give her the time of day. And so Lily, somewhat frantic, devised a way for him to know just how sorry she was. She was going to write him a letter.

Feeling renewed determination seep into her bones, she picked up her quill and dipped it into her inkpot.

_Dear James,_

_I'm a huge idiot. I know I've always called you an idiot, but I was wrong because you're _not_ an idiot and I am. I'm just so stupid. There are not enough words in the English language to describe how dense I think I am. If you wanted me to list all the words I think are apt, I'd have to start using French words. Maybe I'd even have to use Spanish or Russian. But it's not like I'd really know how to say things in French or Spanish or Russian because I'm a big, fat, daft fool and I really only know how to speak English. But that's not to say that if you don't know how to speak any other languages that you're a fool, too. It's really only me who's dumb._

Lily reread what she wrote and promptly lit it on fire once again. Somehow, she didn't think that informing James of how stupid she was would endear her to him. It would probably just make him think that he was stupid for ever liking her. And that wouldn't do.

She sighed again and stretched out her aching muscles. She had been sitting at her desk for about four hours, working on her apology letter to James. When she stood up, she realized how draining letter-writing could be when she felt how hungry she was. She toyed with the idea of going to the kitchens to nick some food before McKenna burst back into the dormitory.

"Lily, just _listen_ to me!" she cried.

But Lily just shoved past her and stomped down the stairs. She could still hear McKenna swearing loudly when she reached the common room. She stopped at the foot of the stairwell and looked around the room. Every single person was staring right back at her. But she didn't pay any attention to them. The only thing she noticed was that James was not present.

Her one-track mind was beginning to worry her a bit. It was sort of unhealthy and it was most definitely very un-pine-y. But how could she even think about being more pine-y when her heart hurt with each and every beat? She didn't _feel_ pine-y, she felt like she was withering away like a birch in the winter.

"Hey, wait for me!" someone called out from behind her, breaking her reverie. Lily stopped and turned around.

"Hullo, Emmeline," she said sullenly.

"Hi," the blonde said once she caught up to her friend. "What's up?"

Lily looked at Emmeline wearily. "Why?" she demanded, cringing inwardly at the accusatory tone of her voice.

Emmeline shifted around uneasily before admitting, "Well, no offense, but you were kind of acting like a really big prat in the common room."

"I'm hungry. I'm grumpy when I'm hungry – you know that," Lily lied easily.

But Emmeline wasn't easily fooled. "You've been acting like this for a few days now, Lil. I mean, I can take it and so can some of the other girls, but most people are really upset with you."

"Upset with _me?_" cried out Lily incredulously.

Emmeline seemed to shrink a little and scuffed her shoe on the stone floor.

"Why on earth would anyone other than James be upset with _me? _Has he been saying stuff about me behind my back?" she asked, her head spinning with what James could have possibly said. Maybe he told people that she was no better than a common whore. Or maybe he told people that she was a bad kisser. Or maybe he told people that –

"_James?_" Emmeline said, her eyebrows rising in surprise. "Why would he be upset with you? I thought you two were friends now!"

Lily flushed a little and opened her mouth to reply when Thomas came barreling down the corridor. The lanky Ravenclaw skidded to a stop before her and it was Lily's turn to raise her eyebrows.

"Can I help you?" she asked coolly.

"Actually, you can," Thomas said nonplussed. He held up a package. "This is for you. I found it in my dormitory and I know how much you love Chocolate Frogs, so I thought it might be a good idea to give it to you. So… here." He held out the box of chocolates, waiting for it to be accepted.

Lily stared at the box. She was torn; on one hand, Thomas was completely right. She _did_ have a huge soft spot for Chocolate Frogs. She particularly liked the way they hopped around in her stomach. It reminded her of how she felt whenever James was around her. But on the other hand, Thomas was a prick who broke up with her and proceeded to hook up with that _Alice_ character.

Out of the corner of her eye, Lily noticed Emmeline staring at her as if she sprouted another head. She couldn't blame her. After all, a few days ago Lily was completely over Thomas and completely into James. A few days ago, as far as Emmeline knew, Thomas and Lily weren't even on speaking terms.

And if Lily had anything to say about it – which she did – it would stay like that, no matter how delicious and hop-happy the Chocolate Frogs were, Lily did _not_ want to associate with Thomas. After all, he had a penchant for ruining her life.

"No thank you," she said curtly.

"But…" he began before Lily felt she had to interrupt.

"Thomas, as much as I love Chocolate Frogs, I don't want _these_ Chocolate Frogs because they're from you." She winced. That was a bit too harsh. "I mean, I appreciate the gesture and all and it's really very sweet of you but…" Lily trailed off, unsure of how to say what she wanted to say without being a total hag. But since nothing came to mind, she simply said, "But since I don't like you anymore and think that you really do have issues with ruining my life, I don't want them."

Thomas stood there, the chocolates still in his outstretched arm and his mouth slightly open. Out of the corner of her eye, Lily could see Emmeline's face turning a reddish colour, probably from holding back a fit of laughter. Deciding that she should act out of concern from her seemingly oxygen-deprived friend, Lily said, "So if that's all, I guess we'll be going."

Lily grabbed Emmeline's arm and dragged her off in the direction they were headed, leaving a surprised and embarrassed Thomas behind them. As soon as they were a safe distance away, Emmeline stopped walking and burst out laughing.

Arching an eyebrow, Lily commented that she failed to see the humour in her current situation.

"Are you kidding me?" gasped Emmeline. "That guy has treated you like absolute ass, and you just completely told him off! His face was priceless!"

Lily allowed a small smile to show on her face. "I guess it was a little funny," she said with no real emotion in her voice.

Emmeline straightened up, noting her friend's cloudy demeanor. "That's not what was bothering you, was it."

Lily shook her head and bit her lip. She was so confused and upset and lost that telling Emmeline everything was very tempting. She looked at her friend and decided to come clean about everything. She told Emmeline about the bet, about Remus and about James. She confessed that she and James had kissed and that she thought that she might have kind of sort of liked James. And then she recounted the tumultuous events of a few nights ago with Thomas and McKenna and James and everything else. By the end of her story, Lily was drained of energy and felt better, but felt empty at the same time.

"Wow," was all Emmeline had to say, blinking in surprise. "Who'd have thought you'd ever end up liking James, eh?"

Lily nodded miserably. Liking James was a bad decision; she saw that now. Back when she hated him, her life was a lot simpler.

"That really sucks," said Emmeline. "You deserve a break from all that… romantic whatever stuff."

"I really do," conceded Lily. Her mind wandered back a week or so when she and McKenna were still talking and were friends and all that. Back when life wasn't quite at pine-level, but was a lot closer than it was now. She had a brainwave hit her right there and then.

"Hey, Em?" she said, getting her friend's attention. "Let's go drinking on Friday."

---

"Let's play a game," Emmeline slurred.

"Oh!" said Heather brightly. "I _love_ games!"

"How 'bout tic-tac-toe?" suggested Lily.

It was early Friday night and the three girls had snuck out of the castle and were at a bar in Hogsmeade. Emmeline had immediately agreed to Lily's suggestion to go out drinking and suggested bringing their other roommates along. Of course, Lily refused to go anywhere that McKenna was going, but since she typically spent Fridays with her boyfriend, she was absent when the other girls got ready to go out.

The bar they were at was small, but it was filled to the brim with young adults, some of whom were swaying to the loud music. Others sat at tables and booths, sipping cocktails and shooting what looked like vodka. Lily sat at a booth right beside the dance floor with her third drink – an Amaretto Sour – sitting in front of her, half finished.

Emmeline rolled her eyes. "Tic-tac-toe is not a game, Lily!" she laughed, waving her Long Island Iced Tea around and spilling some. "I mean, I guess it's a game, right? But it's a baby game! We need to play big people games, like… like Never Have I Ever!"

Lily's eyes brightened up. "Okay! I'll start. Never have I ever… er, I ever liked Sirius Black," she said, eyeing Heather.

"It was in first year!" Heather protested. "And it was only for a month!"

"Don't matter," Lily managed to say, her tongue feeling heavy. "You gotta drrrrrrrrrink!"

Heather stuck her tongue out at the redhead and took a small sip.

They continued to play the game for quite a while, until all three of them were thoroughly sloshed beyond belief. After ordering another round of drinks, Heather suggested that they should try to dance and see who could dance the most soberly. That was fun for a bit because they clearly were _not _sober – in fact; they were probably the drunkest ones there. Lily kept stumbling and falling into her friends, who did the exact same thing.

As Lily moved to the music, she decided that she felt a little better. Sure, she thought, it was probably the alcohol, but the fact that she finally, _finally_ got closure with Thomas helped in perking her up a bit. Eventually, she would have to talk to McKenna, but that could wait a bit. And perhaps one day, she'd manage to get James to talk to her again…

"Oopsie!" she giggled as she accidentally stepped on some guy's foot. "I'm verribly sorry," she told him before blatantly staring at him. He was tall, with messy black hair, a crooked smile and eyes the colour of honey. If she squinted just right, he sort of looked like James Potter.

"That's alright," he smiled. He held out his hand. "My name's Jeff."

"Lily," she yelled over the music, pointing proudly at her head. "My hair is red."

"I can see that," he told her, picking up a lock of her hair. "It's pretty."

Lily blushed and grinned her most flirtatious grin at him.

"You alone tonight?" he questioned, twirling her hair between his fingers.

Moving her hips to the beat once more, Lily shook her head. "I'm with my… I… I am here with Emmeline and Heather."

Jeff moved closer to her and placed his hands on her waist. "No boyfriend?"

Too enraptured with the fact that he was touching her, she didn't answer. Instead, she continued to dance, and he followed her lead. She pressed her body flush against his, and wrapped her hands around his neck.

And he responded to that with a deep, open-mouth kiss. All of a sudden, his touch felt foreign and it made her uncomfortable. The last time she kissed someone like that, it had felt so warm and nice. Lily's cloudy brain couldn't fully process what she was thinking and what she was doing, but one thought sprang to the front of her brain with startling clarity: she wasn't kissing James.

Surprised, Lily stepped out of his embrace.

"This is wrong!" she cried, aghast. "You're not James!"

"Who?" asked Jeff, looking pretty confused.

But Lily wasn't paying attention to him anymore. She ran around the dance floor, looking for her friends. She spotted Emmeline grinding with a guy who must have been at least twenty-five and pulled them apart.

"He's not James!" Lily shrieked. "He's not James!"

Emmeline looked at her friend curiously. "No, I don't think he is, either."

"But then where is James?"

"Lily, he's not here, you silly goose."

"I have to find James!" she said, making up her mind. "I gotta find him and then I gotta tell him everything, Em. I have to tell him _everything._"

Emmelins shook her head and reached out to grab her friend's arm. "No, that's a bad idea, Lily."

"But I have to find him!" Lily insisted. She tore her arm out of Emmeline's grasp and walked out of the bar and stumbled unsteadily onto the street. In her drunken stupor she didn't even realize how unsafe it was to be alone late at night. She was wholly concentrated on James.

"Jaaaaaames Potter!" she called out into the darkness. "Hello? Can you hear me?"

Of course, there was no answer. Lily decided that it would be a good idea to head back to the castle completely inebriated. She walked around Hogsmeade and selected a pathway that she thought would take her back to Hogwarts.

"Jaaaaamessssssss? Are you there?" she yelled, fully expecting an answer. "I have to tell you everything! I have to tell youuuuuuuuuuuuu!"

Normally, Lily would have noticed that there was something off about the path she had chosen. Even if she were just a little tipsy, she would have realized that the giant castle was not coming into view. But since she was way drunker than she had ever been before, she didn't think anything was wrong.

But despite all the alcohol that was swimming around her system, she still screamed bloody murder when someone – or something – grabbed her around the waist.


End file.
